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Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

0 posted 2002-11-19 08:19 PM

Shuddering slightly, a sigh escaping..
So much alike the days of endless waits.
As time crawled across the window
into the cracks of a backlit wall.

Listening for the most subtle of sounds,
a telltale creak, a groan, not unlike the
moan that escapes lips dry from endless
caresses of one’s own tongue.....

Love walks slowly along a deserted road
as leaves swirl the ankles of beauty.  A
gust tugging gingerly against a slit within
a perfect skirt...exposing a glimpse of a
treasured leg....A leg awaiting the touch,
the shiver of my trace....

Sparkling dew still coats the vine of grapes.
Twisting off the most succulent, most formed...
to be held lightly and pressed between
awaiting lips....Lips which my own hunger
for..

Does she see my stare, as eyes caress her
lightly?   Can she hear the beat of a pounding
heart within a chest that awaits the crush of
her against me?

I wait....as the clock ticks   and the tock
clicks....    as the distant click of heels
brings a tock to me........

Tick....tock.....tick....tock....

[This message has been edited by Magnus (11-20-2002 07:10 PM).]

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

1 posted 2002-11-19 08:24 PM

Ya know I won't even try to critique this, or even explain why I like it so much,
but damn, It's a

and I'm keeping it. *s*

"When we're torn apart,
shattered and scarred,
love has the grace to save us"
Saints and Angels as sung by Sarah Evans

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

2 posted 2002-11-19 08:29 PM

Oh, my,my,my......she'd have to be a mummy not to. This poem is way past spectacularly, heart-poundingly
~TERRIFIC~ for all the obvious reasons

Warm regards,
Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

3 posted 2002-11-19 08:30 PM

Be my guest!!! I am very pleased that you
enjoyed this little piece of poetic pie...

Thanx Donna...

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

4 posted 2002-11-19 09:22 PM

...this is being tenderly put to bed in my bibleotheque of loverly poems...

EA

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

5 posted 2002-11-19 10:03 PM

(smiles) Awwwwwwwww, this is sooooooo beautiful and lovely, sweet friend, there's nothing like feeling at home with your love after dreaming away of the ruby slippers a sweetheart wears only to realize they are inside of your love all along! (big hugggssssss) This is gorgeous, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Barry, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

6 posted 2002-11-19 10:13 PM

OOOHHHH, Barry,
I also like this for AALLLLLLL of the obvious reasons. I've got to keep it, too, so I can go back to read it over and over again.
Hey, is there a part two, three, four, etc., etc., etc.,.........

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

7 posted 2002-11-19 10:26 PM

I enjoyed this write.

~wranx

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

8 posted 2002-11-19 10:47 PM

Oh what amazing descriptions here, Barry
I enjoyed it very much

~ loving chipmunk hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

Ivy Rose
Senior Member

since 2001-12-29

Posts 1300
MA, USA

9 posted 2002-11-20 12:13 PM

Magnus...Just plain magnificent!!!! I love the element of mystery that you've added to this love poem. You are truly the poet of romance. ***Ivy Rose

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

10 posted 2002-11-20 01:10 AM

lovely writing...
you're writing is always this way
excellent for my eyes

~~I Love You~~

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

11 posted 2002-11-20 01:37 AM

Vivid imagery love the finish and the anticipation it creates.

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

12 posted 2002-11-20 09:41 AM

enjoy the way you nicely build tension in this and end it with anticipation...

I enjoyed

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

13 posted 2002-11-20 11:54 AM

A love done well...and certainly not un-noticed...even as fate sets its own course and time. ThisDiamond

Eliza
Member

since 2002-11-18

Posts 58

14 posted 2002-11-20 11:57 AM

I, a mere novice, would have but one suggestion, so please, check your e-mail.

Thank you for a wonderful read...

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