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rm711
Member

since 2002-11-30

Posts 131
Wiltshire, England

0 posted 2002-11-30 05:12 PM

Sparkling in the distance
My soul flew away
The echoes of nothing
A silenced voice

All but an eerie gloom remains
My face white and expressionless
My eyes fixed in a gaze
Of hollow fear

Lying there
Now forever
Night falling
Cold and mist looming

Forgotten
In this desolate place
Where fears multiply
And emotion disappears

The wind chills
But I can’t feel it anymore
I look down on myself
As I leave here forever.

Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

1 posted 2002-11-30 05:22 PM

First off, let me start by welcoming you to pip. Second, this was a very nice thought out first post. Welcome to the passions family

Riley

Morning mist clings to my face, and my soul opens up to you......

Star T
Member

since 2002-07-12

Posts 182
Philadelphia, US

2 posted 2002-11-30 08:49 PM

that was a VERY deep poem.the kind i like to read but only get to once in a while.i really will like to know more about the meaning of that poem please fill me in.i'll check back here to read ur reply or u could send it to my e-mail address.a'ight.keep posting!bye 4 now...

PoeticJustice
Junior Member

since 2002-11-29

Posts 44
AK, USA

3 posted 2002-12-01 04:17 AM

I can say but one thing: Wow! That was an awesome poem. I'm new here too, though I've been a poet ever since I met a certain someone. And I can honestly say that this is one of the best poems I have ever heard. Raw, powerful, catchy, it's not missing a thing. I look forward to reading more by you!

rm711
Member

since 2002-11-30

Posts 131
Wiltshire, England

4 posted 2002-12-01 05:15 AM

Thanks all 4 replying
The poem I actually wrote yesterday and I was feeling very distant in myself. To be honest I never actually know what I'm writing because I just type mindlessly and It just comes out. All my thoughts and emotions. I think I was trying to present death to myself but not in such a way that makes it seem like an awful thing - but really The poem can mean whatever you want it to. If it means anything then my job is done.

Rosie Mitchell

Stinky Twinkie
Member

since 2002-11-26

Posts 204
Dinwiddie

5 posted 2002-12-01 11:21 AM

That was pretty good. I can't think of anything else to say.

-Stinky Twinkie-

zarina
Member

since 2001-05-19

Posts 180

6 posted 2002-12-02 07:40 AM

its good

I liked it..

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