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REQUIEM:
New Member

since 2002-09-15

Posts 6

0 posted 2002-09-15 01:51 AM

Entwined in Perfect, Formula-
For all my times to Die:
From the cobwebs; Torturing the world
Inside a w[hole].
...And, Here I am; Dormant. But
Listen.
Whispered Sound of things Sweet...
Making Bed, in a spinning Embrace. Since, It is
with this Bittersweet poison; and ardent Love.
Swallowing Misery...For Now.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Mark Twain

[This message has been edited by REQUIEM: (09-15-2002 04:29 AM).]

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2002-09-15 07:00 AM

Welcome to Passions! A very stirring, strong first write for you to share here with us! Please look around, get acquainted, and know that I will look forward to reading more of your fine work!

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound

EagleScorpion
Senior Member

since 2000-03-08

Posts 1644
Here, Now, Forever

2 posted 2002-09-15 12:39 PM

hmm.. not bad for a 1st post.. better than mine.. geez i fergot what it was.. oh well.. yes very well done WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!!!! my names joe. have a nice day

Kevin

Senior Member

since 1999-11-02

Posts 729
Torrington, Ct, Usa

3 posted 2002-09-15 02:18 PM

First of all, awesome imagry here, and awesome movie *req for a dream*

I especially loved the way you stressed ceratin words with power by capitalizing them

I know you dont have your critique flag up, but you might want to reconsider capitalizing the first word in every line, I know microsoft word is a pain in the behind for poets but the capitalization of the first word in every line takes away from the thunder of the other words you chose to capitalize

Never the less
welcome to passions
great first write
Ive got my eye on you
kev

Kielo
Senior Member

since 2002-02-11

Posts 1109

4 posted 2002-09-15 09:09 PM

You can change that thing in Microsoft Word.
Go into MS Word, click the Tools menu. Click AutoCorrect. The window should pop open, and just click the box that says "Capitalize first letter of sentences"

Then its all better!

Kielo

Oh... *hits head* I actually meant to say that that was a very cool poem. The imagery was great, and I loved the idea. Wonderful, hope to see more from you...

Kielo

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

5 posted 2002-09-16 12:50 PM

Nicely written. Your style is very advanced and unique.

There are a lot of unusual techniques played around with in here... you did well in selecting where and when to unleash these strokes of poetic genius.

Well structured, well composed, and well written. An all-around good poem from what I assume is a very promising poet.

Welcome to Passions in Poetry.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

6 posted 2002-09-26 07:21 PM

REQUIEM:-
This is an extremely well-written piece.
I very much enjoyed reading this and I look
forward to reading lots more from you in the future.
Welcome to Passions!
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

7 posted 2002-09-26 10:18 PM

*raises an eyebrow* Very well done! Very well done indeed! I think I like you, and I think that you're going to add something to Teen Poetry

I have a lizard, and his name is Jake.

[This message has been edited by Skyfire (09-26-2002 10:19 PM).]

eor
Senior Member

since 2002-09-26

Posts 959
blues & greys

8 posted 2002-09-27 04:07 AM

very nicley put together...eor

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

9 posted 2002-09-27 04:36 AM

Welcome to Passions.

You write like someone that used to write here a while ago. A very flowing piece filled with amazing imagery. I can't get over this, It's wonderful.

You're going to be a great addition if you're not who I think you are. Thanks for posting.

~AF~

"It is far more difficult to murder a phantom than a reality." - Virginia Woolf

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

10 posted 2002-10-12 06:53 PM

And he never returned......

The poem was great, the ending was perfect. I loved the style and how you expressed what you needed to say. Very well done.

This post has been brought to you by the 'Totally Awesome Society of Puerto Rican Egotistical Sexy Men'.

Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

11 posted 2002-10-12 06:55 PM

I love how this poem is written, welcome to passions by the way.............hope to see you around

Ri

~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~

quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

12 posted 2002-10-12 08:44 PM

ooh...

i enjoyed this muchly.

excellent imagery requiem.  and great movie by the way.  ::grins::

i'm in love with this line:

'...And, Here I am; Dormant.'

don't even ask me why.  but i love it.

great work and i can't wait to see more.  welcome.

/jen/

i just haven't been the same since that house fell on my sister.

[the closest thing i've found to heaven is sitting here talking to you.bif naked]

PoetryIsLife

Senior Member

since 2001-10-27

Posts 1763
...in my boxers...

13 posted 2002-10-13 09:00 PM

Damn. I LOVED it. Smashing, very very smashing.

(no long-winded reply this time - I'll save that for later)

Sincerely,
Titus

PoetryIsLife

Senior Member

since 2001-10-27

Posts 1763
...in my boxers...

14 posted 2002-10-13 09:02 PM

There's a few writers I miss a great deal, some who write similarly, in such a style which I love.

~Titus

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

15 posted 2002-10-14 09:45 AM

A great read

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

16 posted 2002-12-01 09:20 PM

amazing i hope you come back

zarina
Member

since 2001-05-19

Posts 180

17 posted 2002-12-02 07:41 AM

welcome

And; very good.

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