Teen Poetry #6 |
Along came a Spider |
REQUIEM: New Member
since 2002-09-15
Posts 6 |
Entwined in Perfect, Formula- For all my times to Die: From the cobwebs; Torturing the world Inside a w[hole]. ...And, Here I am; Dormant. But Listen. Whispered Sound of things Sweet... Making Bed, in a spinning Embrace. Since, It is with this Bittersweet poison; and ardent Love. Swallowing Misery...For Now. Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Mark Twain [This message has been edited by REQUIEM: (09-15-2002 04:29 AM).] |
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© Copyright 2002 anonymous albert ? - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Welcome to Passions! A very stirring, strong first write for you to share here with us! Please look around, get acquainted, and know that I will look forward to reading more of your fine work! Karilea |
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EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever |
hmm.. not bad for a 1st post.. better than mine.. geez i fergot what it was.. oh well.. yes very well done WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!!!! my names joe. have a nice day |
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Kevin
since 1999-11-02
Posts 729Torrington, Ct, Usa |
First of all, awesome imagry here, and awesome movie *req for a dream* I especially loved the way you stressed ceratin words with power by capitalizing them I know you dont have your critique flag up, but you might want to reconsider capitalizing the first word in every line, I know microsoft word is a pain in the behind for poets but the capitalization of the first word in every line takes away from the thunder of the other words you chose to capitalize Never the less welcome to passions great first write Ive got my eye on you kev |
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Kielo Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109 |
You can change that thing in Microsoft Word. Go into MS Word, click the Tools menu. Click AutoCorrect. The window should pop open, and just click the box that says "Capitalize first letter of sentences" Then its all better! Kielo Oh... *hits head* I actually meant to say that that was a very cool poem. The imagery was great, and I loved the idea. Wonderful, hope to see more from you... Kielo |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Nicely written. Your style is very advanced and unique. There are a lot of unusual techniques played around with in here... you did well in selecting where and when to unleash these strokes of poetic genius. Well structured, well composed, and well written. An all-around good poem from what I assume is a very promising poet. Welcome to Passions in Poetry. Parasite Learn to place poetry before people |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
REQUIEM:- This is an extremely well-written piece. I very much enjoyed reading this and I look forward to reading lots more from you in the future. Welcome to Passions! ~Vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
*raises an eyebrow* Very well done! Very well done indeed! I think I like you, and I think that you're going to add something to Teen Poetry I have a lizard, and his name is Jake. [This message has been edited by Skyfire (09-26-2002 10:19 PM).] |
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eor Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959blues & greys |
very nicley put together...eor |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Welcome to Passions. You write like someone that used to write here a while ago. A very flowing piece filled with amazing imagery. I can't get over this, It's wonderful. You're going to be a great addition if you're not who I think you are. Thanks for posting. ~AF~ "It is far more difficult to murder a phantom than a reality." - Virginia Woolf |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
And he never returned...... The poem was great, the ending was perfect. I loved the style and how you expressed what you needed to say. Very well done. This post has been brought to you by the 'Totally Awesome Society of Puerto Rican Egotistical Sexy Men'. |
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Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
I love how this poem is written, welcome to passions by the way.............hope to see you around Ri ~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~ |
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quietlydying
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935the wonderful land of oz |
ooh... i enjoyed this muchly. excellent imagery requiem. and great movie by the way. ::grins:: i'm in love with this line: '...And, Here I am; Dormant.' don't even ask me why. but i love it. great work and i can't wait to see more. welcome. /jen/ i just haven't been the same since that house fell on my sister. |
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PoetryIsLife
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763...in my boxers... |
Damn. I LOVED it. Smashing, very very smashing. (no long-winded reply this time - I'll save that for later) Sincerely, Titus "My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems." |
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PoetryIsLife
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763...in my boxers... |
There's a few writers I miss a great deal, some who write similarly, in such a style which I love. ~Titus |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
A great read |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
amazing i hope you come back |
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zarina Member
since 2001-05-19
Posts 180 |
welcome And; very good. |
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