Teen Poetry #6 |
Shy Emotions |
LegalSecret69 Member
since 2003-06-04
Posts 69Virginia |
Her shy tears crept out of her soft blue eyes, and streamed down her cheek with grace They quickly reached her pale pink lips, and formed a shimmering chain of lace With every blink of her tired eyes another silver tear would fall Each one, scared to run, so gently they would crawl Each little tear would kiss the scars and cuts that they would pass They'd place a silver band-aid, so that the hurting wouldn't last Finally, when the tears were done, they would sadly fall to her feet Then again, they'd blur her eyes, for eyes are where all tears meet.... |
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© Copyright 2003 Jessica - All Rights Reserved | |||
idleeyes86 Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 64Somewhere over the rainbow |
I really like the silver band aid bit, (how ironic as it kinda contradicts the poem I wrote about tears) But you really made use of the almost reluctance tears fall from your eyes much in the same way many people are scared to show them. Teardrop poems can become very cliched whereas you had a completely different approach to it |
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laurie Member
since 2003-05-28
Posts 153canada, ontario |
beautiful, secret. simply beautiful. l have to agree with idleeyes86, my favorite line is the bit with silver bandaid. laurie. |
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BrokenDreams Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425In The Clouds |
Well I was gonna out my faorite part but I like the whole thing so I think I'll just put it into my library. I think I like the beginning the best... *Jen* If you listen hard enough silence can mean more than words. |
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Toasty Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 74my little hole in wisconsin |
wow. this is simply beautiful. no other way to describe it. excellent. I'm adding this to my personal library. Keep up the good work! :0) "Nothing is so strong as gentleness; Nothing so gentle as real strength." -Francis de Sales. |
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infinite disaster Member
since 2003-06-01
Posts 69Illinois |
wow. that was so beautifully written. i liked it a lot! keep up the great work. much love. |
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LegalSecret69 Member
since 2003-06-04
Posts 69Virginia |
hey you guys...thanks so much for all of your replies...they really made my day. You guys are the greatest!!! ESP, thanks for the reply, and noticing my spelling error..haha. Well, I'll be posting...and also looking out for some of yalls peoms...so I can read and reply as well. Thanks again -Secret |
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