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Teen Poetry #6

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frolicking dolphin
Member

since 2003-02-23

Posts 268
my own special world

0 posted 2003-08-11 08:21 PM

Just a dream for now, but I hope you like it

Walking along the beach
Your hand clasped with mine
Our path lit by the shining moon
You know the time is right
We lean in and gently lock lips
You ask if this is all alright
And soothingly peck my cheek

By then you know that I am yours
To hug and hold in your loving arms
To give your heart to, and receive one from
So protect me from the thundering storm
And I promise I will never leave you torn
Together we will remain as one
until our lives are done.

~*~Karen~*~

~Dream like you'll live forever,live like you'll die tomorrow~

© Copyright 2003 Karen Clark - All Rights Reserved

Deep_Inside
Member

since 2002-02-14

Posts 377
i can't stop hiding

1 posted 2003-08-12 03:14 AM

this piece was alright. definitely sweet keep writing

when you live you begin to die
when you die memories of you life lives in others
when memories of you begin to fade
you truly begin to die

BrokenDreams
Member

since 2003-02-09

Posts 425
In The Clouds

2 posted 2003-08-12 12:49 PM

I loved it. It was sweet and romantic without being "mushy" if you know what I mean. Thanks for the read.

-Jen

"One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it's expressed in the choices on makes." -Eleanor Roosevelt

Lexy
Senior Member

since 2003-01-28

Posts 1038
California

3 posted 2003-08-13 06:15 PM

I found the end to be a little weak. It made me feel all happy. I liked this piece.
good job.

Tequilia_Sunrise
Senior Member

since 2003-02-19

Posts 612
Lochalsh, Ontario, Canada

4 posted 2003-08-13 07:59 PM

very nice i enjoyed this very much
thank-you

Tequilia

lilkittywoundering
New Member

since 2003-03-24

Posts 3
SF,SD

5 posted 2003-08-14 04:20 AM

thought it was wounderful. Makes you fantazie!!!!

yankees01rugby
Junior Member

since 2003-08-13

Posts 48
USA

6 posted 2003-08-14 10:14 AM

this was a good write. its a dream i wish will one day come true.

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