The Word of the Day is Adore

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Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

0 posted 2002-10-15 10:34 AM

I idolize your admiration
for the constant declaration
of the words sown like seeds
inside my heart.

With reverence I wait in silence
spoken words I hate and why not
venerate my heart a little more,
if you say you truly care.

Buckets of affection pouring
the ducts and folds of love exploring
idulging in an expidition deeper
towards the center of my soul.

Admire but do not loathe me
your expectations shall expose me
to the abominations of your own
love lost in mine.

-----------------------------------------------------------------
wow... where did that come from?
I don't think I like it...

"Wie ein Quadrat in einem Kreis, eck' ich immer wieder an obwohl ich doch schon lange weiß, daß ich niemals ändern kann." ~Wizo

[This message has been edited by Allysa (10-15-2002 11:17 AM).]

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

1 posted 2002-10-15 03:04 PM

I could tell this was a "where'd that come from?" poem from the start, because the flow of it is so natural and spoken... and the rhymes are so chaotic and undecidedly placed.

I do like it though, it has many good elements about it... although admittedly it isn't the best thing you've written, it still qualifies as above average for this forum.

Can't wait to read more from you, Allysa.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

2 posted 2002-10-15 05:29 PM

Beautifully written.
Pure emotion- wonderfully expressed.

Jenn

Why is it that we are at our most ingenius only when trying to destroy the things that keep us alive and thriving?

clumsy
Member

since 2002-10-10

Posts 106
canada.

3 posted 2002-10-15 05:53 PM

me likies

knightlyshadows
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 791
obscured vision

4 posted 2002-10-16 03:40 PM

-loved- this Allysa. Flow was great and so was the rhyme scheme. this is one of my favs that i've read from you lately. Enjoyed it much. Keep writting

“A single choice can build destinies, or destroy them.”

Getting away, isn't Running away.

"The hurt that you try to hide, is killing me."

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

5 posted 2002-10-17 04:40 AM

The words in this poem astonished me. You composed this splendiferously! I loved it a lot, you see?
Splendid poem Allya, indeed.

This post has been brought to you by the 'Totally Awesome Society of Puerto Rican Egotistical Sexy Men'.

Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

6 posted 2002-10-17 10:13 AM

I forgot to add this earlier (because I had to go take tests) but this poem was inspired by you, Javier.

Thank you all.

"Wie ein Quadrat in einem Kreis, eck' ich immer wieder an obwohl ich doch schon lange weiß, daß ich niemals ändern kann." ~Wizo

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

7 posted 2002-10-21 06:56 PM

Allysa~
Well, I can't tell you where this came from,
but I CAN tell you that I really like it...LOTS!
As LP said, the flow of this was extremely smooth
and natural and that made it very easy to read.
Nicely done.
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

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