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Teen Poetry #6
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Day Strokes
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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Day Strokes |
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IndigoEve Member
since 2003-01-10
Posts 279Etched in the illusion of time 
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you will always remember me midday dancer with dandelion crowns woven midst my hair flowing river of brown long rippling golden in the peaceful sun tragically I was promised to the earth daughter of the ever-changing skies I knew of you as you softly knew of me unspoken, yet alive as the hours broke, and the air cried sweet, sweet sorrow tauten in tears twilight came in melodies of bleeding azure so you sang quietly by the willows to your tune of antiquity, I would wilt drowning through the waters of restlessness stained with lullabies of soundless grief upon my brow, lightly you'd kiss me into kindred sleep flourished and unknowing this blushing rose of yours intrigued by a simple harmony fell to the hands of love you painted me in day strokes of sunlit transparency would we sigh oblivious, and I, oh I the spinner of dreams losing herself through misery was found impassioned by the moon to dance wildly in the fields we were one then the stars entangled in my soul tainting me with this memory of eyes so hazel that I can see no more tell me now, my precious keeper how you stayed so innocent as the world fell apart oh so slowly around us all For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.--"Romeo and Juliet" [This message has been edited by IndigoEve (07-27-2003 06:12 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Imbued - All Rights Reserved | |||
Riley 
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
wow, this was an amazing write....definatly a library piece...... *the bloody tide comes in on the shore, time after time* |
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BrokenDreams Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425In The Clouds |
This was really cool. I could really feel the whole thing. Thanks for the read. -Jen |
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OtherSideOfTheMirror Member
since 2002-12-19
Posts 245 |
Brilliantly written, good style. I enjoyed this. GOOOOOOOOOD JOOOOOOOOBBBBBBBB!!!! ~cassi |
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Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
This is beautiful. Light and easy to read. I loved it, the way you formed your words. It was uplifting in a way. Reminds me of faries and fireflies..  great write. One of the best I've read in a while. ~Lex.. |
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dertah Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584 |
wow, excellent write. |
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freudian_slip New Member
since 2003-06-20
Posts 7collective soul of humanity |
wow... I thoroughly enjoyed this poem.. the imagery was fantastic. well done |
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chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
You keep getting better and better all the time. Even though I haven't been here in a while, it did me some good to read your poetry. Your lyrical wording and phrasing is something to be proud of. The extensive vocab is perfect for this piece, and the tone well suited. I don't blame anyone for wanting to add this to their library. It's a very memorable piece. Keep up the writing! Your poetry continues to blossom, and will no doubt flourish throughout the approaching winter. -Leah  |
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Song_for_Serenity Member
since 2003-05-28
Posts 97USA |
Once again, a magnificent piece. I would say that it is my favorite of yours, but I said that about your last poem and it just wouldn't be fair choose one over the other... so I'll just settle with saying that you're one of my favorite writers on this site. The imagery was amazing in this poem. Very beautiful write!  ~Angela |
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