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Teen Poetry #6
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I hate you, I love you
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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I hate you, I love you |
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sixington Member
since 2003-07-14
Posts 53Utah |
I hate you. I hate the way you look at me, I hate the way you smile. I hate everything i ever see. I hate the way your eyes tear up, I hate the way you cry. I hate the way you always say that i am not a f#ckup. I hate the way you stereotype, I hate your so-called friends I hate it that you always gripe. I hate the way you cringe. I hate the way you look at me, like you'll never look again. I hate the way that your eyes shine. I hate the way they hide you. I hate the way that you won't be mine. I hate the way he guides you. I hate the rainbows on your car, the pink and yellow shirts. I hate that you will not go far, but i will still not find you. I love you. I love the way you look at me, I love the way you smile. I love everything i ever see. I love the way your eyes tear up, I love the way you cry. I love the way you always say that i am not a f#ckup. I love the way you stereotype, I love your so-called friends I love it that you always gripe. I love the way you cringe. I love the way you look at me, like you'll never look again. I love the way that your eyes shine. I love the way they hide you. I love the way that you won't be mine. I love the way he guides you. I love the rainbows on your car, the pink and yellow shirts. I love that will not go far, but i will still not find you. |
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Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
annoying. I found it annoying. the statements are good, but the constant I love I hate you thing just didn't work for me, borerd me, really. Just one persons opipion though. ~Lex |
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Toasty Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 74my little hole in wisconsin |
I'm no expert, but here's my advice: your statements are great, but repition can kill a good poem.Try to find different ways of wording the hate & love. Just a suggestion. ~toasty "Nothing is so strong as gentleness; Nothing so gentle as real strength." -Francis de Sales. |
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punkrockerrobin 
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
wow even better than the pome on 10 things i hate about you |
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collarbone_girl Junior Member
since 2003-07-14
Posts 45Wonderland |
no... this was good. yeah, your choice of words could have been better, but not in the love hare bit. i liked the repetition, and if you had changed it it would take away the point of the poem. i've written one just like this before!! i like. this cool noght air is curious... |
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frolicking dolphin Member
since 2003-02-23
Posts 268my own special world |
I don't really like this one, It's too much like the 10 things I hate about you poem, but it goes too far. ~*~Karen~*~ |
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