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Teen Poetry #6

Fourth of July

sixington
Member

since 2003-07-14

Posts 53
Utah

0 posted 2003-07-14 01:35 PM

The people swarm around
Dressed in red
White
Blue
And a little girl
All in pink

Saving the world,
One color at a time.
While i wear grey

Outside
Inside
Everything i see
In grey
Except the little girl
In pink.

Why couldn't that be me?

Rise of Truth
Member

since 2003-07-12

Posts 59
Beneath the Fury Sun

1 posted 2003-07-14 02:27 PM

My common refrain; diversity is beautiful.

Poetically, its attractive. Though i'm at ends with the exact meaning. Maybe this is one time i shall shut up and color.

I am the prophet
Harbinger of what you fear the most
Your enemy of belligerent honesty
Destroyer of your livelihood, built on falsehood

Song_for_Serenity
Member

since 2003-05-28

Posts 97
USA

2 posted 2003-07-14 05:44 PM

Hey there! I'm assuming that you're the one I referred this site to from TOD. I hope you enjoy piptalk, you'll get a lot of really good critiquing here. People are honest, but kind. Anyhoo, this poem was good, but I agree with Rise of Truth, the meaning is a little vague, but maybe that's how it's supposed to be. Poetry's open for interpretation and really, it's about the poet. Once again, I hope you enjoy this site. Have a spiffy day!

~Angela
"Anything less than mad, passionate love is wasting your time...Life has too many mediocre things in it, love shouldn't be one of them..."

BrokenDreams
Member

since 2003-02-09

Posts 425
In The Clouds

3 posted 2003-07-14 06:51 PM

First of all, welcome to Passions. This was a pretty good first post, and I look forward to seeing more from you, although I also can't really see one particular meaning behind it. Good write nonetheless.

-Jen

"One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it's expressed in the choices on makes." -Eleanor Roosevelt

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