navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Lonely Girl
Teen Poetry #6
Post A Reply Post New Topic Lonely Girl Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
BrokenDreams
Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425
In The Clouds

0 posted 2003-05-19 10:44 PM


She was deserted by those she thought she knew.
Left alone to fend for herself in a sea of empty faces.
And in this game that we call life,
She's nothing but a lonely pawn.

Every day, that same old routine.
Plaster on a fake smile, pretend it's all okay.
Hide behind her mask of lies, fortitude leading the way.
No one sees the truth behind her eyes.

Hiding behind the suface of what people see,
The real her is screaming to be let out.
But theres too much pride standing in the way.
No on can see how she cries.

The war rages on, inside and out,
Nothing left to prove, nothing left to show
But the scars of lost loves and past battles
That now litter her once pure skin.

Her only refuge from the raging storm,
Is to lock it up, never to be let out.
Forever has come and gone in her short time here,
All that's left to do is wait for her final day.

© Copyright 2003 Jennifer Rick - All Rights Reserved
skyshine
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-02-07
Posts 3058
Beneath the northern stars
1 posted 2003-05-19 11:33 PM


It's really sad when some people feel this way, but a true fact of life that they do. In fact, everyone does at one time or another. Very intense poem.

~Elizabeth

Dreams last for so long, even after you're gone...
~Jewel

peachesNcream
Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears
2 posted 2003-05-20 09:43 AM


Ohhhh...great job! I REALLY like this one. Another one for the library...LOL! ~Jess

"What I am is good enough if I would only be it openly."

Le Capitan de L'Amour
Member
since 2000-07-15
Posts 60

3 posted 2003-05-20 10:56 AM


I hope you can overcome these sad feelings within yourself, I want you to know that the way that express your emotions in this poem is very intense and I like that but I hope that you are now better and if you are not then just cheer up, life is beautiful and what it offer is both joy and sorrow, but its up to us what path choose, I hope you choose the right path. I want to thank you for charing your poem with us and I really hope that you will feel better.Thank you!

AlostHeart
Member
since 2003-05-01
Posts 78
Wisconsin, U.S.
4 posted 2003-05-20 12:03 PM


Hey you,
I try to tell you that im here for you whenever you need me. And so is Alicia.. We want you to tell us your problems. You can't keep them kept inside forever. Sooner or later it's going to tear you apart. and then what? Well I'm here for you and thats the main point i wanted to get across to you. Don't be a stick in the mud and let your spirit be free!!(that includes your feelings, problems, snd thoughts!)
     I Love You Hun!(and you know you can't question that!)  See ya lataa
                      ~Tori Louise~

BrokenDreams
Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425
In The Clouds
5 posted 2003-05-21 11:51 AM


Thanks to all who replied. And Tori I know you guys are there but there are some things you guys just wouldn't understand. I'm sorry to sat that but it's true. I'm more messed up than ya'll realize.
Jenni

There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can't.

AlostHeart
Member
since 2003-05-01
Posts 78
Wisconsin, U.S.
6 posted 2003-05-21 12:06 PM


Maybe we would be able to understand if you gave us the chance to. did you ever think about it that way? You dont let us in to know whats wrong. You'd be surprized at what we would acctually understand.
             ~Tori Louise~

Dont ever love a guy that will never love you back, no matter how hard you try.

BrokenDreams
Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425
In The Clouds
7 posted 2003-05-21 12:14 PM


Ususally when I try to say something important I  get blown off so I quit trying. Theres so point in wasting my breath saying stuff if nobodies going to listen anyway.
Jen

There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can't.

ESP
Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556
Floating gently on a cloud....
8 posted 2003-05-21 02:55 PM


Hey,
I found this to be a very expressive poem, an emotive read.
Sometimes things going on in your life can seem so messed up to you and you think no one would understand so you feel isolated. Sometimes it's better to talk about it, because maybe you're not really messed up but just feel like you are. And none of us here would blow you off while you were trying to say something.....
I don't know you at all, but I would still listen to anything you felt like talking about and try my best to understand and help, if help were even what's needed. Sometimes a sympathetic ear is enough. So I would think people who know you and care about you would certainly do that for you if you'd let them. Don't hold it all inside, it doesn't do any good.
pigletdoglet@hotmail.com is my msn if you ever want to talk.
As I said, great poem.
Hugs, Liz xx

"Gorge the honey from life, and live through the stomach aches knowing they will pass..." ~Liz Pinard 2003~

AlostHeart
Member
since 2003-05-01
Posts 78
Wisconsin, U.S.
9 posted 2003-05-21 04:41 PM


When The Hell Have I Ever Blown You Off? That seems to be news to me!.!

Dont ever love a guy that will never love you back, no matter how hard you try.

BrokenDreams
Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425
In The Clouds
10 posted 2003-05-21 10:06 PM


Thanks to all those to have relpied!

Tori people blow me off all the time whether you realizr it or not. But I'm not gonna get into it right now because frankly I'm in a good mood and I'd like to stay that way. Forget about it anyway, it's water under the bridge. It doesn't matter anymore. If I would have known that posting this poem was gonna cause such a problem with you I would have never posted it in the first place.

And thanks again to everyone replying, especially ESP. The offer is much appreciated.
Jenni

There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can't.

[This message has been edited by BrokenDreams (05-21-2003 10:08 PM).]

snoduck
Member
since 2002-11-15
Posts 99
Selah, WA
11 posted 2003-05-22 01:03 AM


Hey hun, I really like this poem. It's really dark but i like it just the same. I know what it's like to not want to talk to people, to want to lock everything inside yourself.  But you have got to understand that your friends are probably the only thing that can help that. They'll listen... and they're right, you have to give them a chance for them to be able to understand. Don't ever lose sight of God, and never stop writing. Because I'll tell you what, if i hadn't started writing poetry in the first place, with some of the things i've been through in my life, i might not be here today.  You know, they say its easier to talk to a faceless stranger than to talk to close friends or family. If you ever want to talk or share poetry outside of this, feel free to email me at angelnpink420@netscape.net, or IM me on aim (angelnpink420) or yahoo (prettiernpink420)

I hope you overcome your battles, but don't lock everything in so deep that you can't do anything about it. I don't know the details of your situation, but according to your poem, you're locking up something that can't be locked up. Take it from someone who's been through everything... literally everything. You are not alone as much as you would like to think so. This was a great poem, and like i said email me or IM me, maybe i'll share a few details of the nightmare I used to call my life.  Thanks again for the great poem, keep writing, and keep your head up.. there is always a rainbow after a storm.

-Erica-

ESP
Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556
Floating gently on a cloud....
12 posted 2003-05-22 07:19 AM


You're welcome Jenni. I'm glad you're feeling better now....just gonna say: the offer stands, anytime, so keep me in ur address book
Liz xxx

"Gorge the honey from life, and live through the stomach aches knowing they will pass..." ~Liz Pinard 2003~

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Lonely Girl

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary