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Teen Poetry #6
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Just Passing
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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Just Passing |
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Jeremy Halstead Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569Morris, Ill. U.S.A 
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Just Passing Just been nugded to my left by an acquaintance so rare. So long since we've talked, but follow I dare. A dingy cloud of smoke I now must pass through, while still I do walk to the beat of the tune. Amongst random faces, I peeked and I peered; My friend is now lost, and now I must veer. Pushing and coursing through these bodies amass, the clearing has reached me just as you pass. Was that lylac, jasmine, or roses abloom. Who though that heaven could find me so soon? This cascade of sences stops all the noise. The world now is empty, and we fill the void. Brushing just passed, I'm lost in the lovely breeze that surrounds you and now has become me. Let us just be here for one moment more. This second is something I've not know before. J.D.H. Curse not upon love, for it is the greatest of great things. Be it not love that curses you....but thy lack thereof. -J.D.H. [This message has been edited by Jeremy Halstead (04-19-2003 04:04 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Jeremy D. Halstead - All Rights Reserved | |||
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tornskirt Member
since 2003-03-30
Posts 87 |
wow. i thought that your poem was very well written. i enjoyed it. thanks for the read, keep it up |
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SilentTears Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 371Lost and Broken |
OOO! I really enjoyed this one! It's refreshing to read a poem not all 'depressing,' even though that is my favorite type of poetry! LoL. Either way, EXCELLENT write on your part! You have my vote! As I smile at everyone else, I'm dying inside... ~Me |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
This is a really nice piece....Enjoyed very much!!!! Bridgette  "Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown |
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LuckyFelix Junior Member
since 2003-01-17
Posts 34Here. |
I like this a lot. Very nice. |
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MissKlarmic Member
since 2003-02-20
Posts 70Canada,N.S |
wonderfull rhythm to it, a life in its own |
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BrokenDreams Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425In The Clouds |
awesome! You have my vote. Jenni There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can't. |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
I seriously wish someone would write something for me *sigh* I wish I could inspire someone or something..hrmm..n/m loved it nonetheless going to go cry now.. If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried. [This message has been edited by Ceinwyn (05-21-2003 01:57 AM).] |
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AlostHeart Member
since 2003-05-01
Posts 78Wisconsin, U.S. |
I like this Well written as well.... ~Tori Louise~ Dont ever love a guy that will never love you back, no matter how hard you try. |
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blueyedlioness Member
since 2003-04-24
Posts 289USA |
Nice... I especially like the last two verses. And it IS nice to read something not dark and depressing for once. Even though it's my favorite kind too. Keep on writin'... -Lioness |
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*Belabebeautiful*
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
Another Flawlessly presented one. I loved the idea behind this one, much like one that I wrote a while ago called casual Hello. The idea of a 'per chance' meeting intrigues me and I like the whole context of the poem. Well done, enjoyable read. ~Live and Laugh~ Always strive for excellence never perfection. |
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ESP Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556Floating gently on a cloud.... |
Let us just be here for one moment more. This second is something I've not know before. --------------------- Oh yes, perfect!! Beautifully put  Love, Liz xx "Gorge the honey from life, and live through the stomach aches knowing they will pass..." ~Liz Pinard 2003~ |
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