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Danielle
Member

since 1999-12-01

Posts 80
Providence, RI, USA

0 posted 2003-05-02 10:17 PM

I found love when I looked into your eyes
I saw your sould within you big bright smile
I gave up the life I knew just so I could be with you
I hope it was the right thing to do because
I want to spend a forever with you

You send shivers down my back
And make my hair stand on end
You make me cry tears of joy

I want to give you the world
There's so much I want you to see

Blessed Be Those Who
Reads My Writing

jaysh
Member

since 2003-04-16

Posts 133
IL, USA

1 posted 2003-05-02 11:13 PM

beautiful....so easy for me to relate to right now...keep up the good work!

Mon Cherie

Senior Member

since 2001-10-31

Posts 922
Land of Never-ending Summers

2 posted 2003-05-06 10:13 AM

Danielle, this is very well-written, except for the typo errors. Maybe you could have a spell check done before submission. Otherwise, the poem would've been just perfect!

_,,,^.^,,,_
Florence

blackandwhitehorizon
Member

since 2003-05-05

Posts 183
an akward state of mind

3 posted 2003-05-06 08:09 PM

you describe your emotions nicely

newguy04
Junior Member

since 2003-04-23

Posts 17
ohio

4 posted 2003-05-06 08:20 PM

i like it. Its good and expains how teens feel about the opposite sex

BrokenDreams
Member

since 2003-02-09

Posts 425
In The Clouds

5 posted 2003-05-06 10:05 PM

hey, yeah except for some typos its really good.
Jenni

To hate you must first have loved.

jayd
Junior Member

since 2003-05-04

Posts 13

6 posted 2003-05-07 08:12 AM

Hey i like your poem as it is easy for alot of people to realte to and it expresees how you really feel

FlyingCloud
Member

since 2003-04-28

Posts 151
A little place inside my head

7 posted 2003-05-07 06:50 PM

*sighs* I wish there was someone special in my life. But alas, it has been denied.
Great write, especially since many people can relate to it!

+Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood.+
T. S. Eliot (1888 - 1965)

Kellie_Cantrell
Senior Member

since 2002-05-22

Posts 1667
New York

8 posted 2003-06-22 12:34 PM

well written and sincere. good job

Love,
xXx~*KELLIE*~xXx
*My poetry website
http://www.freewebs.com/poettree/

*Hurley*Girly*
New Member

since 2003-06-22

Posts 6

9 posted 2003-06-22 01:24 PM

hey... it was pretty good.. i enjoyed it .. i think all the writers here are doing a good job.. keep it up .. remember to let the emotions flow.. u dont have to force poetry .. good job .. keep it up you'll only get better with experience

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