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Teen Poetry #6

Run.

LuckyFelix
Junior Member

since 2003-01-17

Posts 34
Here.

0 posted 2003-04-22 05:53 PM

I ran alone.
Until I dropped back for you.
I learned to run with you.
Keep in step, in stride.
We were as one.
Then you slowed,
and I tripped up.
I turned to see you standing.
Next to him.
Looking at me as if nothing happend.
So I wiped the dirt from my wounds,
the tears from my eyes.
And now, again, I run alone.

BabieDoll
Member

since 2003-02-13

Posts 268
BFE

1 posted 2003-04-22 06:26 PM

This is very good...but very sad!

I liked this very much though. Good job hun.

Wuv ya!

~J.Lynn

"In life you must dance like no one is watching, sing like no one is listening and love like it's never going to hurt..."

peachesNcream
Senior Member

since 2001-08-21

Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears

2 posted 2003-04-22 09:35 PM

I've already told you what I thought of this poem but I thought I would reply anyway, just because I'm nice like that. haha. I think the running idea was really creative. This was sad but good! ~Jess

"The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept."

SilentTears
Member

since 2003-02-15

Posts 371
Lost and Broken

3 posted 2003-04-23 04:36 PM

Sad but good. I like the metaphor you used in this poem. Nice job!

As I smile at everyone else, I'm dying inside... ~Me

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