Once I thought you were ugly

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Yellowesque
New Member

since 2002-10-05

Posts 1

0 posted 2002-10-05 07:12 PM

Compliment the dust on my shoes
Grass green from growing flirting with my ankles
ruining my bare ass hued stalkings
and looking to be stalked

As if no one have ever heard the whimpering
the doe eyed furtuve glances that are my affection
you stand looking in the looking glass and raise your glass high

Toast the pious new coming off teh steeple
from a wire not connected to San Fran
but from a source so high
no one fights for a by line

Is there a bi line, I ask you, fingering
slowly the condensation off your glass
leaving it naked to your lips
lips marked by thist, wind, sheer bitter

No. All or nothing. Cards face up. Chickens counted
You breathe a sigh, mourning a loss of a love
not yet encountered, and grin like berries
a new day, a strawberry in your champagne

Secure in decisions we did not make
a phatom self confidence runs through us
me, you , it's all the same
Strictly her for a him, not for an elusive heiress

Decisive
To think
Once I thought you were ugly

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2002-10-05 07:23 PM

Welcome!

Interesting first post....I will want to read this one again.
Please check your email for a special greeting!

devinechild22
Senior Member

since 2002-08-28

Posts 571

2 posted 2002-10-05 11:41 PM

This is awesome for a first poet! I thought.."o this person must`ve posted like a billion things..o wait what`s this..First poet!" I think you are an awesome writer. keep thwm coming..

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

3 posted 2002-10-06 02:39 AM

This is such terrific writing. It's so simple, and yet somehow, I found it extremely erotic... I don't know, something about it just appealed to the sexual part of me... probably the constant sensory appeal.

Maybe I'm just a pervert.

Oh well. Welcome to Passions. Have fun reading, replying and sharing with everyone.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

Christopher

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-02

Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

4 posted 2002-10-06 03:27 AM

the title caught me, the poem surprised me, and i am enchanted. i'm adding you as the fourth person (counting myself, lol) to my private library as a person to watch.

i loved the clever plays on words and the unbrokered honesty felt throughout this tiny journey of exploration. it could have been a minute, but ends up timeless.

peace and welcome,

Chris

Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

5 posted 2002-10-06 09:19 PM

I liked the piece, but thought the inconsistency of punctuation took away from it......you used it then you didn't......
Ri

~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

6 posted 2002-10-10 09:50 AM

This is is such a wonderful peice of writing and a great first post, thanks for sharing

Andrew

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