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Teen Poetry #6
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another charades poem
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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another charades poem |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg 
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(This one I wrote on the bus, on my way home. I was inspired by something I read earlier... and just had to do this before I lost my inspiration. So tell me what you think... maybe some of you are too young to know what this is about, but we'll see.) Run onward men, our colours underlying Regard ye not these faceless men are dying. Attention forth, o common man I see I mark you blue There's three points total - two for me And one for you. So hold them high and wear them proud To call you from the marching crowd. And ye who love and lie with men I mark you pink There's three points here - two pointed back And one distinct. So hold them high and wear them proud To call you from the marching crowd. And ye whose roles are run askew I mark you black, and yellow too That hatred not be lost on you So hold them high and wear them proud To call you from the marching crowd. And me, I'm painted white and black and red My tyrant's roar Will cleanse us of the beasts they've bred - What retribution lies in store. Run onward men, our colours underlying Regard ye not these faceless men are dying As grey is weak, they'll soon be dead All in the name of white and black and red. |
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| © Copyright 2003 Brian James Lee - All Rights Reserved | |||
PoetryIsLife 
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763...in my boxers... |
Brian: Hmm... I have a few guess', but none I think are close. You 'guise it well, or maybe not, perhaps my mind is simply not connecting the dots. I'll be curious to see what the answer truly be. The poem itself is written quite well. I like the length (having just read one on the shorter side by you, I feel like I was able to supersize this read, as it were.) I forgot (hence the soon to be edit): where did you get your current style? It's old-fashioned, prime and propper, rogue; there's a correct term for the style, but it's not coming to mind. Did it develope or did you take the style and make it your own once attracted to the style?  TitusFacts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. --Aldous Huxley [This message has been edited by PoetryIsLife (01-22-2003 07:59 PM).] |
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Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
Brian, once again you make me look like a bad poet, next to what you write. This was good. , haven't read from ya in a while.Haven't talked to ya lately either. Well anyway.....good job  Riley Morning mist clings to my face, and my soul opens up to you...... |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Brian, ugh - I hate you. This has confused me no end, no matter how many times i read the bloody thing. Bugger you.  Ok, my guesses (bad, bad word) started off at homosexuality for some reason. I figured the different aspects of colour and the underlying theme (in my head that is) came across strongly as that. I then thought of AIDS but that's definitely not it. So I'm sticking with my initial interpretation - homosexuality. It's still well written, better so than your other one. I enjoyed it. ~AF~ "Write something, even if it's just a suicide note." -- Gore Vidal |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Nah, not homosexuality. But homosexuality is related to this poem, it's just not the entire topic. |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
quote: Wow, very well written, very powerful lines, thanks for sharing this with us. Would this happen to be about the segregation and extermination of communists, coloured, homosexuals and jews in the Nazi German Concentration camps? Yeah I now that I read it again, I'm thinking that this is what it is definitely about... the colors gave it away, red, white and black are the colors of the Nazi standard, homosexuals were branded with pink, jews with a yellow star... My Violent Bedtime Stories [This message has been edited by Marshalzu (01-23-2003 01:03 PM).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
And ye whose roles are run askew I mark you black, and yellow too That hatred not be lost on you So hold them high and wear them proud To call you from the marching crowd. And me, I'm painted white and black and red My tyrant's roar Will cleanse us of the beasts they've bred - What retribution lies in store. Run onward men, our colours underlying Regard ye not these faceless men are dying As grey is weak, they'll soon be dead All in the name of white and black and red. ============================== you are just way too smart and talented for youre own good I agree with the above guess...but after reading this...the game seems less important than the gift of your rhymes. |
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PoetryIsLife
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763...in my boxers... |
Damn. I should've seen that. I'm impressed even more so. Did you ignore my question for any particular reason? ~Titus Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. |
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Jaime
Registered
MemberPosts 250 |
I'm just an observer... I thought your poem was brilliant. The content, style, etc.. it makes me mad though because I am having a dry spell. Oh well, maybe I'll write something soon. - Jaime Shiva went on break now look at how much it's gonna take to make this place a space where we can breathe. |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Oh, OH! Mardi Gras!!! Ok, I still have no idea. "Write something, even if it's just a suicide note." -- Gore Vidal |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
some one pointed out, nazi and so on in that vein. I could see that, but im not really sure though, I hate guessing *grimaces*, but i thought this was a superb piece. very well written. the repetiveness(sp) suited the poem and made it more powerful in certain instances. well its nice to be reading your poetry again, Brian. im curious as to what your poem is about it. Regina |
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Eromyna Member
since 2002-11-29
Posts 306Pheonix, AZ, USA |
That's awesome. I love the use of colors in poetry. It gives the imagery another (sometimes forgotten) dimension. "I don't need to scream for you to deem me aggravation." |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Nice guesses everyone. But you're wrong. Nope... put all the colours together... . . . . . . .  Bam, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers! Complete with all the colours, the promiscuous Pink Ranger, the unusual Blue Ranger, and the colour-coded minorities - black and yellow ranger. Of course, with their valiant leader, decked out in black, red and white. Anyone who's watched the show is familiar with the grey men they beat up. WWII? Pfftth... you guys get points for effort, I guess... |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
*HAHAHAHA!* Aww Brian.. I was thinking along the same lines that everyone else was until I saw your reply. You can make the... um.. simpliest and most childish things seem so deep and philosophical. Of course, I guess that's your job, since that's what you're studying. Anyway.. great poem all around. You had me stumped! Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you.--Jesus Christ |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
LMFAO!!!!!!! I can completely see where you get homosexuality from now, Brian -- hahahaha! Very amusing. "Write something, even if it's just a suicide note." -- Gore Vidal |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
Hehe now, I have to say I was certain that is what it was about, just shows how many poems can be open to interpretation. |
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