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Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

0 posted 2002-08-09 02:07 PM

The porch before me
of steps worn and gray
A path to another year
to a place of yesterday

Wooden slatted floor
Worn seams with tiny cracks
A child’s eye could see the world
from beneath, within this
sanctuary.

The mysteries held within
the darkness beyond the door
Peering from end to end
light filtering through the floor

What demons could lurk behind
a wall or a pillar tall.
Thunderous heart throbs sounding
an echo ‘gainst the wall.

A child would find a haven
among the shadowy demons there
Dark as the feathered raven
a chill that stalked the air

Creaks and groans and damp fall
upon the ears and chilled skin
Listening for a ghastly call
from the darkness deep within.

The fright of whispered thought
within the mind of fantasies
To the door,a trail is sought
from beneath a porch he flees

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2002-08-09 02:15 PM

You managed to leave goosebumps...
and that's a good thing...
and they're still...
moving...

sign of a good writer...

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

2 posted 2002-08-09 02:16 PM

Barry

So many places a child can go and feel the creepy of imagination's whim...loved this look at yours.

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

3 posted 2002-08-09 02:23 PM

Sun....goood, gave me goosebumps too!
Just a time when a boy's mind would run
a mile a second...and more...

Martie...yes...a look into the imagination
of ME! Oh goodness, so many years ago..
But I still remember that porch.....

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

4 posted 2002-08-09 03:31 PM

Barry! This is excellent with fantastic imagery.
Great write and enjoyed so much.
~Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

5 posted 2002-08-09 04:01 PM

Barry - well done write, with fantastic imagery. I felt as if I was there...

BC

Goodknight
Member Elite

since 2002-06-15

Posts 2386
Ohio, USA

6 posted 2002-08-09 07:38 PM

Barry - mine is a trip to a dark basement - maybe I will post the poem that I wrote of that scary time - this is so well done - I loved it - Paul

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

7 posted 2002-08-09 07:42 PM

BRAVO!!! Oh Barry, this is powerful, I LOVE IT, I too know this eerie feeling when I was little or now when I step and sojourn in my old neighborhood and I feel there are always those raccoons of my old nightmares crawling about me! (sigh) This is a powerful retrospective thought, sweet friend, I love it, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Barry, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

alterego
Member

since 2002-02-23

Posts 113
Toronto, Ontario, Canada

8 posted 2002-08-09 10:21 PM

This evoked memories of youth, hiding in my grandfathers barn - but you never really knew if you were alone or not - everything creaked.

Nicely done.

Sheila

Create something infinite today - Smile!!!

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

9 posted 2002-08-09 11:21 PM

This is so wonderful, Barry...
it took me back to a summer when I was 4 yrs old and we took a bungalow upstate for the summer...
You described that porch perfectly, as well as my emotions when I hid beneath it.

There was also a little pump house for the well...and my cousins and I would run past it really fast because we were convinced that an old wicked witch lived there and it was she, who made that pumping noise...

thanks for bringing this all back to me.

~ hugs from the chipmunk under the porch

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

10 posted 2002-08-10 06:35 AM

Excellent images most can relate to Barry! Exceptional write......been there!

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

11 posted 2002-08-10 09:59 AM

Enjoyed this, Barry. Brings spooky childhood thoughts.
Sandra

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-21

Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song

12 posted 2002-08-10 11:17 AM

Mine was always in the top of an old elm tree and when I say top....I mean poking my head out 40 feet up top. Very cool to be taken back to those moments through your words. Sort of makes me wonder why I don't visit those memories too often. Very cool sir, I especially liked the way you convey the vulnerable without making it seem unnatural. I great read for sure and saving to my library for memories sake.

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

13 posted 2002-08-10 11:22 AM

I really like the feel of this one; it is nostalgic, yet it feels mysterious, haunting. I'm not certain why, but that's what it does to me when I read it.

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

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