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Open Poetry #20

Loss of love

See me?
Member

since 2002-02-13

Posts 93
UK

0 posted 2002-04-15 10:56 AM

Loss of Love

When did you stop caring?
One day it was your shirt I was wearing
But now all I wear is my heart on my sleeve
Just for you to snatch it and it to once again grieve
All I want is for you to care
You don’t have to say I love you if you don’t dare,
Why don’t you think of me?
And remember how we used to be
The way that we would laugh and smile
Is it too much to ask for that back for a while
Why is there so much pain?
Every time you do it again
Why can’t you swallow your pride and make amends
Why can we just be the best of friends?
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Sorry not one of my best but i'm having a writers block at the moment, it is from the heart but any comment would be welcome, God Bless.

Life is about change,sometimes its painful,sometimes its beautiful,sometimes its both.

Dulcinea
Senior Member

since 2001-07-22

Posts 774
IN

1 posted 2002-04-15 12:35 PM

Sometimes, just cleansing the heart of its pain unplugs the blockage. So purge on, you will find the flow with this eventually, though you did manage the rhyme. Try just letting it write itself, without rhyme or reason and see where that leads. I believe a poet's best work are sometimes the "pain" poems, only because they come from the heart...well done.

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

2 posted 2002-04-15 01:36 PM

"One day it was your shirt I was wearing
but now all I wear is my heart on my sleeve."
Nice expression of your feelings...James

DawnG

Senior Member

since 2000-06-23

Posts 1494
United States

3 posted 2002-05-15 01:21 PM

Ok, maybe this is not one of your best, but I feel you have accomplished a much greater goal. That is in getting your feelings across superbly. I felt as if I was right there as you were talking to this person or in your mind as you were having these memories.

Dawn

bsquirrel

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-01-03

Posts 7855

4 posted 2002-05-15 01:23 PM

God love y'.

She said burn ... together.
-TON

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