Almost a Doctor....(bad medicine)

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rwood
Member Elite

since 2000-02-29

Posts 3793
Tennessee

0 posted 2002-05-17 11:36 AM

We were traded for wrestling tickets
and a three hour tour, daily with no meat
only fork fed inferiority complexes
because he held a degree

Mr. College man knew everything
The books wept and folded up
in dog eared pages, done

Nick-named Frankenstein
by his co-workers
for lack of heart
or a real spine
just knowledge
A walking dictionary
of medical terms
There wasn’t a cure
for mensa

Still I ran about
carrying his child
in hapless attempts
to be a wifey
with teen streamers
still hanging
from my thoughts

He was the messiah
to our li’l country town
and I was supposed to smile
real pretty for being
his favorite flavor
that day at the ball park

I sold myself shy
of a split nickel
My family thought I “ought”
to be took keer of
by a man of high standing
well he was tall
and that was all
but nobody knew that
I forget why he chose me
said something about love
but was always more interested
in the score

Chuck Norris was his hero
even on our anniversary
About as romantic
as bullets in a sewer ditch

Everyone smiled
at his wallet
thinking his brain
must be the missing link
to prosperity
Almost a doctor and all
The ring was fake
he needed a new bowling ball

When late nights came
and the games were on
I wore the lingerie
the invisible kind
or at least it made me invisible

Made feasts at dinner
for his army, he and his stomach
and pressed white scrubs
that he threw in the floor

I cried and he laughed
Said it was postpartum depression
Diagnosed me while I nursed the baby
and did dishes at the same time

One night he forgot
to change a diaper
while I worked all day
Li’l baby didn’t need
feeding either
Wrestlemania came first
So I did a pile driver
on the bumper of his car
straight out into the street
after I gave his crotch
a scissor hold
and left him hanging
on the ropes

He almost needed a doctor
as my son and I
learned how to heal on our own

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

1 posted 2002-05-17 11:49 AM

This is a powerful piece, Regina. Filled with anger, anguish, and angst. It is also filled with your strength.
Quite a remarkable write

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

[This message has been edited by Interloper (05-17-2002 12:25 PM).]

rwood
Member Elite

since 2000-02-29

Posts 3793
Tennessee

2 posted 2002-05-17 11:59 AM

Interloper: Thank you poet..I don't normally reveal this real of me..but today was the day..Appreciate you so.

Sincerely,
Reg

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

3 posted 2002-05-17 12:11 PM

regina

a woman has many sides
and many names for them
that is what makes her a woman

great write, you healed a wound here

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

4 posted 2002-05-17 12:24 PM

Regina

I could see parts of myself in this bitter and powerful telling. Through such times, that is where growing happens and wisdom's truth. Hugs for your strength!

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

5 posted 2002-05-17 12:46 PM

rwood,
You always gather me up in your writings. It is a good and powerful write. You have my empathy.

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

6 posted 2002-05-17 12:53 PM

Good for you, Regina...
You are a strong woman and this poem is beautifully written and very powerful.

I have a very dear friend who had such a similar experience that this poem could have been written about her. I actually wrote a poem for her, but its only about one of his "milder" problems. If you would like to see it, please click on the link at the bottom of the message. I've never put a link into a reply before, so it may not work. If it doesn't, the name of the poem is "The Gift"

~hugs for the strong words

The Gift

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

7 posted 2002-05-17 12:56 PM

Regina, This is so very well written,
and could have been me....many years ago.
Amazing, healing write...
done with much built-up anger,
frustration, and yet....a bit of wit.
Well done poetess!
~Hugs~

bsquirrel

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-01-03

Posts 7855

8 posted 2002-05-17 01:12 PM

I love how you use your angry humor to help you through life ... I really enjoyed this, Regina. You have amazing words of depth and ache, and beauty...

She said burn ... together.
-TON

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

9 posted 2002-05-17 01:34 PM

Well girlfriend this purge deserves a phone call, get the phone will ya?

~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~

Christopher

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-02

Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

10 posted 2002-05-17 02:01 PM

...

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

11 posted 2002-05-17 02:22 PM

The comparisons and descriptions you use are remarkable. I cna't believe this happened to you...and, if it did, the poem is more amazing still

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

12 posted 2002-05-17 03:45 PM

There is as much left to read between the lines in this one as is written on the page. A stricking portrayal of an abusive relationship. If this is from personal history, my heart goes out to you as I've..."been there, done that". If not, you've captured it perfectly. Well done

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

13 posted 2002-05-17 03:46 PM

Your expressions are well said...James

Christopher

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-02

Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

14 posted 2002-05-17 04:27 PM

ok, i'm back...

reg - this overwhelmed me. first, with the way it was written... the passion, the pain, the sarcasm, and shame (rhyme unintentional). it was linear enough to follow easily, yet striking enough to pierce through understanding and deep into empathy. second - just the implications of this - there are many forms of abuse, and none is better than the next. but i think to a person who feels through life, being ignored and unappreciated is the worst.

this touched me as few do. must just leave with a wow.

Chris

rwood
Member Elite

since 2000-02-29

Posts 3793
Tennessee

15 posted 2002-05-17 11:06 PM

Dark: Yes..thank you for recognizing that. I suppose there are bits that I would like to forget..but I must remember they helped to make me, me...You are poetically wonderful to my woman sides..

Martie: I'd say that most of us have experienced somewhat of a taste of this medicine. A hug works so great for healing..thank you deeply.

Seymour:

you are a wonderful man. thank you..

Lyra: That rototiller..was worth more money than my entire household of furnishings, including the car. When I left..there was nothing monetary to leave..or take. But my son and I have always been rich with love. Selfishness only buys you loneliness. Thank you so much for sharing with me and for your thoughts.

Nancy: I inherited my father's sense of sarcasm..and my mother's left hook. I found my own pathway of womanhood..gosh..it ain't easy is it. Hugs to you sweet lady.

bsquirrel: Thank you for thinking so highly of me and my attempts to share out loud. It inspires me..soothes me..makes me feel real.

Mysteria: Would love to hear from my mentor!! Yes..I spilled. Hugs and nods of understanding. Thank you poetess..friend.

Balladeer: Sometimes..I can't believe it did either. I look back and think to myself..how I was just a little girl..with big eyes and a big heart. Now..just have big mouth..LOL!!
Be good and be honest to thyself.
Is that a good motto? Hug you for your thoughts.

Hoot_owl: Your heart thoughts are very appreciated..mine goes to you too, for knowing..hugs poet..

James: Thank you for your support..sincerely poet..you offer me goodness. Hugs.

Christopher: Yes..it was a death of spirit sort..to be so invisible..to be so taken for granted..a little piece of you dies each time inside. Thank you for both of your replies today and always..appreciate the understanding deeply.

Sincerely,
Reg

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

16 posted 2002-05-18 11:36 AM

Regina...I just wanted to thank you for reading my poem, but I also wanted to let you know that the rototiller was just the TIP of the iceberg.
He was very selfish and egotistical...an ER doctor who thought everyone should bow to his MD degree, especially his wife.
He may have bought her expensive gifts but they had no meaning. He never really thought hard about what to get her until she told him that she didn't want anything that plugged in. I think she would have preferred a nice dinner out, some flowers or at least some of his ATTENTION which he never gave her except to yell at her that the house was not neat enough. They did have plenty of money, so she hired a cleaning woman and he just exploded even more with "I don't pay someone to do MY job, and this is Your job, how DARE you spend my money to hire someone to do it"
It was that macho, selfish attitude of your ex's that was so similar to his!

You did this poem so very well!

~ strong woman hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

[This message has been edited by Madame Chipmunk (05-18-2002 11:36 AM).]

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

17 posted 2002-05-18 10:22 PM

BRAVO!!! Wow, this is intensifying, sweet friend, I could feel such anguish in these words and how your anger rised all throughout the poem in climax and by the end, you felt all relaxed again like right when you started reading this! (kiss on cheek) I think we can all relate to times like these, sweet friend, this is wonderful, we all llve you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Regina, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

18 posted 2002-05-18 11:23 PM

Almost a doctor? he will never be all he can be. Almost a man? Not with that attitude. Glad you adjusted him a bit, maybe gave him a little mental surgery to alleviate him from the pressure of an imbalanced ego.

[This message has been edited by Midnitesun (05-18-2002 11:24 PM).]

Christopher

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-02

Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

19 posted 2002-05-19 02:15 AM

curious - does being here help at all? the recognition, appreciation? I see you.

hugs

C

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

20 posted 2002-05-19 02:24 AM

Did your son tell you I called

I did! LOL, I don't wish that man well at all, I can tell you that much that I know for sure. You are right about one thing, it made you stronger, smarter, and definitely more of a "woman" that I am proud to know hon.

~* Carpe' Diem *~

my3monkeytoes
Member

since 2002-05-11

Posts 152
In the Carolina Breeze

21 posted 2002-05-20 08:55 AM

There is a song by Madonna (quit laughing) that makes a very strong statement:

"Many miles, many roads I have traveled, Fallen down on the way.  Many hearts, many years have unraveled, Leading up to today...and I thank you".

I've read the replies above, and from those acquaintances I have in my non-virtual circle of friends also...so many people, TOO MANY people, have similar stories.  While it is a shame we have to experience such pain, it does lead us to where we are now.  One day, I plan to send flowers to my ex, and tell him 'thank you', because of where even that pathway has lead me.  He won't get it, of course (ha!), but it will be very soothing for me.

"A woman's life is comprised of many journeys.  Revel in where the pathways have lead you."

You are a better person now than you would have been without your experiences, Regina...and a very strong woman.  Thank you for sharing with us!

Peace to  you.

~Sydney McLean

rwood
Member Elite

since 2000-02-29

Posts 3793
Tennessee

22 posted 2002-05-20 09:52 PM

Lyra: Goodness..I know you are glad to not have to see someone you care for go through all of that still..So glad you are supportive and that you recognize the strength of sisterhood. Thank you so much for your comments and caring. Hugs to you!

Noah:Thank you darlin'. I know you will never be one to look past the beauty of a person. You bring it out as well..Love and hugs.

Midnitesun: Exactly. You are so right. Don't know if I could have ever done any good with that..but I taught my son differently..that was my main objective..or some other lil bright eyed girl could be getting the same from him...NOT if I had anything to do with it! Thanks poetess.

Christopher: appreciation for art and human kindness is a blessing to me...and for me..and I thank you and everyone for having a place to share..Sharing is like cultivating your soul. Hugs to you poet..I feel them too.

Mysteria: Nope.he did not! Hope you got my letter..I so appreciate you lady!

Sydney: Yes..we are the way we came sometimes..and sometimes we just are. I am happy with that..Thank you deeply for your understanding.

Sincerely,
Regina

msflame
Member

since 2002-05-21

Posts 188

23 posted 2002-05-21 07:46 PM

wonderfully told, enjoyed reading.

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