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Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

0 posted 2002-05-11 12:59 PM

*one in a series of 'Immortal Women' poems....

Chimera awoke before the dawn
Quickly gathered her sword and shield
Their enemies were sighted nearby
And their land they would not yield

Immortal clan of women, they,
Fiercely protecting their fold
Forced to defend themselves
From mortals young and old

Their offspring left two days ago
To hide in a mountain cave
Warrior women standing now
Vowed no man would claim them slave

Battle cries piercing break of day
Mounting on their fiery steeds
Riding now to surprise the intruder
Hoping this ploy succeeds.

The surprise they intended
Was not theirs but mortal man
For they were hidden outside of camp
And knew of this sunrise plan

Immortal women die only thus
By sword thrust to the heart
Sixty women lay dead by noon
Piled on the gravediggers cart

Chimera, fallen behind a tree,
Hidden by a fallen branch
Sole survivor of her clan
Cowardice her only chance.

The cart drew the bleeding bodies
To the lake know as the ‘Weerin’
No trees would grow in brackish land
It lay desolate and barren

One by one her sisters were thrown
Into the water of black opaque
Chimera watched in silence
No sound did she make

When the mortals left the place
Amidst cheers of victory
The did not notice one immortal girl
Creep forward stealthily

The immortal sisters watery grave
Beckoned Chimera in her woe
She stood upon the bloody shore
Vowing vengeance to her foe

She slid into the lake of souls
Taking the suffering she found there
Now she was leader of the clan
Accepting her fate with a prayer

She vowed to seek the mortals
To spill their blood upon the ground
As she stood amongst the dead
The valley heard her wailing sound

Miles away the mortal army heard
The howling of the Immortal Queen
Blood ran cold upon their hearts
At the grieving Chimera’s keen

She walked for days to the mountain
Finding her sisters well and alive
None more than fourteen years old
Her destiny to teach them to survive

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

1 posted 2002-05-11 01:11 AM

YES, YES, YES! Oh this is so good! I felt like I was looking at it, not reading it. I hope this is the start of something LONG.

We should spend less time worrying about when our life is going to end and more on when it's going to start!

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

2 posted 2002-05-11 01:15 AM

I craved popcorn while reading this--it's a movie in my mind!!!! I love these so much...I'm looking forward to the rest. Not just for me to read either...grinning, I want everybody to see these!

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!

hugging myself...(only cause you're not here!)

Christopher

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-02

Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

3 posted 2002-05-11 01:53 AM

interesting choice... the chimaera.. one of my favorite mythological beasts. cool, interested in the follow up for sure!

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

4 posted 2002-05-11 05:41 AM

Fantastic and interesting writing...James

tracie66
Member Elite

since 2000-01-18

Posts 4713
Australia

5 posted 2002-05-11 06:25 AM

BRAVO!!!!

This is an awesome write, very visual and a joy to read...this was for me a very interesting and mystifying read which I really enjoyed, thanks
~HUGS~
Tracie

Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe

NapalmsConstantlyConfused

Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 529

6 posted 2002-05-11 06:47 AM

ah! yes! what mysteria said! write us a story!
-Dave

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

7 posted 2002-05-11 09:24 PM

WOW!!! This is excellent, yes, yes, this just has to be a story, I thought of Lord And The Rings and Braveheart in one reading this in my head, this is marvelous! (kiss on cheek) May Chimera's justice be served and all sinister values be retributed, sweet friend, this is excellent, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Sharon, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

8 posted 2002-05-11 09:31 PM

Oh yes, I could see this so clearly within
my mind...and feel her sadness and anger...

The tide shall turn soon and the worms in
hot ashes shall squirm in fright...

Nicely done, enjoyed..

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

9 posted 2002-05-11 10:20 PM

WELCOME Poet DeVine. Exciting write filled with spirit and passion. High praises to the writer. ThisDiamond

bsquirrel

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-01-03

Posts 7855

10 posted 2002-05-12 02:06 AM

Oh my Goddess this rocked!!! (signed, incoherency man)

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

11 posted 2002-05-16 04:18 PM

I can see all of these in a book, with wonderful illustrations. . . yes. . . something that needs to be told. . .

what an excellent linking of myth and story. . . I love it. . .

---------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

12 posted 2002-05-16 04:41 PM

PDV...it's great to see you so inspired these days. Might I perhaps borrow your muse for a short time?

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