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Open Poetry #20
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Please don't crumble
| Open Poetry #20 |
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Please don't crumble |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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Please don't see the forest for its toothy trees. Please don't set the sky back by another aged day. Please don't scatter tarnished coins in the icy street. Please don't crumble children's chalk to sugar in your fists. Please don't sing to call down rain in earthquakes of dissent. Please don't pray to bring the fallen ribbons that you bear. Please don't dance to test the softest spot for your grave. Please don't cut your eyes out with these honing words I tend. Please don't fall asleep in a lichen burdened rest. Please don't count the calendar as an enemy. Please don't fall apart on the dark stair all alone. Please don't die on your side. I need you here, with me. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
"Please don't dance to test the softest spot for your grave." oh man...and smiling too, that line led me to believe you were talking to ME! (Until I read the last line, of course!  )But oh yes...this one is another resonater. I do believe I'll be quoting you for a long time...hope y'don't mind? |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
Please don't dance to test the softest spot for your grave. Lotta great lines in this but as K, that one struck me! |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Nah, y' can quote me if y' want. This poem's about a sad time -- my roommate had to fly out to Texas to visit her mother in the hospital, and she just last night had a stroke and went into a coma. Things change at the speed of light. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
very sad, then the explination, breaks my heart.... |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
SEA, thank for sharin' the sadness for a li'l bit. I appreciate your words. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Now that I understand the meaning here... I too am sorry.... ~Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
*sympathy* I know... |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Glad you all enjoyed and thanks for the support. And the reason why you probably didn't immediately think "Oh, someone's in a coma!" when I wrote this is 'cause I never write to state something that bluntly. It's more about the impressions, the maelstrom of feeling, more than the actual thing. So this poem can be applied to other situations too -- it's just that's the frame of mind that inspired it. Anyway. Thank you all for your words. |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
crumbling here M...you've struck a cord with this one... hang in there... *strong hugs for you sweetie* Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggsssssss) This is so very beautifully heartwrenching, sweet friend, my heart goes out to all who experience loss before their eyes and this is a powerful prayer that can be spoken to those who hurt to help them heal and restore hope! (sigh) My heart goes out to you, sweet friend, this is touching with powerful repetition, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Michael, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thanks, d and Mistletoe. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
bsquirrel - liked this a lot. Well written with much meaning... BC |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Please don't count the calendar as an enemy that is a great one..I can apply that to myself ... you do have a style all your own... *s M |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
I'm glad the flower and the arrow enjoyed this li'l bit of sadness. I'm feeling better, too. Yay poetry. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I confess I'm terrible at extracting hidden meanings from poems but, after your explanation, this one becomes crystal clear. I'll try to be sharper next time |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Please don't die on your side. I need you here, with me. So sad, Bernie...but beautifully expressed. ~hugs of sympathyLyra |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thank you all. Things are as they are. And my name's not Bernie! I appreciate all yr words. |
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