Open Poetry #20 |
Sun & Moon |
Elan Member
since 2002-05-03
Posts 382State of Wide Eye |
Sun & Moon Golden beams of Sun, Ancient goddess of wonder, Gazed upon orb of blue And dressed it in her light, All of nature Welcomed her, All but man… Her smiling face warmed Some hearts She brought forth in radiance Land’s delights, But pleased man Only briefly… “Give me the Night,” said man “Allow me rest, For I am weary, and Would lay my weight down.” Sun said, “May all stars embrace you In their net of wonder, Bestowing their glow Of night’s enchantment Over your weary shoulders, And may you dream The dreams of the Just.” Then, Sun faded. Moon came, pale, and ghostly Casting shadows cool mists, And seemingly was to never end. Man rested, but then awoke With a start For the birds were not to come Nor rivers to run Nor tides to touch the shore For without the Sun, There was no ebb and flow And only dark Encompassed all. Man became afraid. There was no Light to his path, and he stumbled And fell, and grew cold, and sad. Man demanded of Moon, “Give the Sun Back her sky! Allow Her warmth to return That I may hear The songbird once more, Before I die, And rest eternally! For then, And only then, would I want your Face in mine, again.” Moon hesitated, holding fast To the stars and the black glitter of Velvet night, and shone brighter, Trying to trick man Into allowing him stay. “Man in the Moon! Give me Sun back! My bones grow too cold, and I would Have her light my face once More with her tender Warmth!” The moon waned, And fell from the sky, Leaving but a fingernail Behind, to beckon, and Greet the blood-red rise Of Sun’s return. And to this day, Man Awakes, and smiles With the Dawn, and shakes Off the cold of night. |
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© Copyright 2002 Elan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
This is very very good...guide you....heh! You give lessons with this one... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Elan I am very fond of sunshine..Loved the story in this. You write with grace! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Sun said, May all stars embrace you In their net of wonder, Bestowing their glow Of night's enchantment Over your weary shoulders, And may you dream The dreams of the Just. Then, Sun faded. Moon came, pale, and ghostly Casting shadows cool mists, And seemingly was to never end. Man rested, but then awoke With a start For the birds were not to come Nor rivers to run Nor tides to touch the shore For without the Sun, There was no ebb and flow And only dark Encompassed all. ========================= Elan...this is as elegant as your name... a celestial sigh...lovely, lovely writing poetess...truly. jm |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Élan darling girl oh my word this is just too too gorgeous, should writing ever be this perfect? Beautiful writing, absolutely beautiful Do you have to really write this well darling girl? Hmmm? Is it fair to be such a good writer when I can’t manage to soar on the wings of soul Hmmm? I forgive you because this is utterly utterly perfect. Absolutely perfect darling girl an elegant and seamlessly flow of sunlight and star shadow, but what else can I expect from someone called Élan. Love and warm stuff As always Mushy To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace Luke 2:79 [This message has been edited by Marsha (05-06-2002 07:21 PM).] |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
The moon waned, And fell from the sky, Leaving but a fingernail Behind, to beckon, and Greet the blood-red rise Of Sun’s return. Elan - this is soooo good!! Love it. Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
A wonderful tale in verse. What inspired this one? [This message has been edited by bsquirrel (05-06-2002 08:02 PM).] |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Elan, this is absolutely incredible! I loved every line of every stanza! Your writing is flawless and exquisite! ~Hugs, Nancy~ |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Elan~ Welcome to Passions~ This is a lovely piece of writing~ The form made for a captivating read~ *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
YAY!!! Oh Elan, this is absolutely wonderful, sweet friend, I love it! (big hugggssssss) Your words of wisdom and imagery light these pages, sweet friend, this is amazing, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Elan, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Bridget Shenachie Senior Member
since 2002-01-23
Posts 1056Kansas USA |
A beautiful story of night and day. Love your imagery! Shenachie |
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Elan Member
since 2002-05-03
Posts 382State of Wide Eye |
Yes, Magnus, please, guide me...I have a lot to learn...thank you so much for your heh comment...smiling here... Martie, we need both, the Sun & Moon, and should never ask for one over the other, and always be careful in what we ask for to begin with...thank you so much for reading... JanetMarie...I hope you will come to find that it takes a lot of work to maintain any name...and I hope you continue to come in to read...thank you! Marsha, your exuberance is only matched by your friendships, and you seem to have many of them...thank you so much for the applause...it is a very, very kind sound... Nightshade, I am so glad you liked that particular line, because I do not know where it came from, but it seemed to fit....thank you!... bsquirrel - where did it come from? The answer is probably somewhere in the heavens, for I know not, but that a friend slipped one or two words my way, and said "see what you might do with this..." Thank you for your gracious time in reading... Enchantress...indeed, my dear, I have a long way to go before it pleases my critical eye, but I do see a vast array of poets around me who do write poetry so well, and this makes for a very good home...thank you! Marge, your words alone would inspire anyone to write...thank you for your generosity... Noah, thank you so much for your enthusiasm! Shenachie...sometimes imagery is all we have...thank you so very much! |
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