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wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

0 posted 2003-02-20 02:19 PM

I’ve been wondering

What it is, about truth
That you find so distasteful

Does it burn on your tongue
Like an ambitious Chorizo?

Or lie cloying on the palette
Like an over-ripe cheese?

Do you fear that the bones
Of veracity will catch
Choking in your throat?

Or that the aroma of reality
Will foul your sweet breath?

I’d rather you tasted with me
The plain beans and bread
Of honesty

Than offer me only
The confections of deceit

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2003-02-20 02:27 PM

ah yes Ed...much preferring beans & bread
to cake and candy...

Excellent...

why isn't it up for the book?

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

2 posted 2003-02-20 02:30 PM

I sort of like this,
And I sort of think it could use more work,
But it’s just my desire for metered rhyme.
The phrases are wonderful
The expression very good
And a powerful overall theme

Gloom

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2003-02-20 03:07 PM

well done

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

4 posted 2003-02-20 08:23 PM

Ed I'd like to believe that these walls I've built around myself were extreme and foolish measures, but moments like this one, you've captured so perfectly make it hard for me to tear them down. Sorry you had to write this

WhileIWasGone
Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 486

5 posted 2003-02-20 08:32 PM

*smiles* Nice work Ed...

Enjoyed
Heather

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

6 posted 2003-02-21 01:47 PM

And, I've been wondering how I missed this earlier. Very well said.

Enjoyed greatly, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

Corinne
Member Ascendant

since 1999-10-28

Posts 5167
state of confusion

7 posted 2003-02-21 03:21 PM

lies sweet as sacchrine.

another good one, Ed!

Chorizo - whooo! That can be murder on the gut!

Cor

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

8 posted 2003-02-21 03:44 PM

not all that is sweet is good...

this however..is very good..

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