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Little_One
Junior Member

since 2003-03-16

Posts 34
montana

0 posted 2003-03-18 01:33 PM

10:30 pm

Sometimes I dont understand you
And maybe I wont
But let me remind you
THat my heart is breakable, so please dont

I can seet he pain, the hurt, and the sorrow
And I can see it all coming
My heartbeat is so loud
It sounds like a firedrum druming

10:45 pm

I close my eyes and think of you
And my voice begans to quiver
I dont know for sure
But I think you made me almost pull the trigger

You write so many different poems
Some of me, and some of her
I just cant beleive this now
For I once used to be so for sure

11:00 pm

I open my eyes
And slowly falls a tear
You true love and your true passion
Are the only kind of cure

11:30 pm

I am thinking of you tonight
Once a smile is now a frown
Desprate cries of your tender kiss
Slowly muffle and drown

Falling asleep and thinking of you
In my dreams is where happeness lies
Maybe hoping of at least one more touch
Before my fading heart dies

1:30 am

Waking up to find stars
And trying to count them tonight
Remembring what Angels said
About telling me for you I was going to have to fight

For you I will fight
Under the stars and the moon
I love you always and not matter what
I pray you'll be mine soon

1:45 am

Friendship is so important
But our love is so deep
My last waking thoughts are of how precious you are to me
As my head falls down to sleep

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

1 posted 2003-03-18 03:09 PM

I really like the concept of this one, the way it's spread over the minutes and hours of the night. I like it.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

2 posted 2003-03-18 07:46 PM

Kristen - this part is amazing - nice opener:

Sometimes I dont understand you
And maybe I wont
But let me remind you
That my heart is breakable, so please dont

ahhh know this - very nice - break it up and edit - will do wonders . . . xxoo

WhiteRose
Member Elite

since 2002-07-23

Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon

3 posted 2003-03-18 07:58 PM

Very nicely done, enjoyed the read of this.

Little_One
Junior Member

since 2003-03-16

Posts 34
montana

4 posted 2003-03-18 09:57 PM

Thanks everyone for reading my poem.

Love little one

Little_One
Junior Member

since 2003-03-16

Posts 34
montana

5 posted 2003-03-18 11:09 PM

Shayne, this note is for you. I want you to know that I will always be your friend...always

Love always

your hope for love

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