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KoKo
Senior Member

since 2003-02-15

Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow

0 posted 2003-03-18 09:27 AM

Shattered whispers fill my ears
Midnight songs disappear
Raging love becomes raging madness
As you bled me dry, left only sadness.

Distant fog now looks much more tempting
Than the promise you made me of exempting
All the history I hide behind me-
A tail I never flash as shiny-
Waving words of anger and lust
Broken smiles covered in rust
Bruises purple, cuts still crimson
In my own heart I was kept in prison.

You made a promise of taking it
All away, instead of shaking it
And disturbing these old memories
These burning, endless enemies.

A fool's grin lays across my lips-
I won't believe it! Throw away the scripts
That claim you lied and I, a fool,
Enwrapped them as a precious jewel.

Am I a fool for not seeing it
Or now knowing it but denying it?
When does this turn out right for me?
When will my old soul fight for me?

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
--Chang Tzu

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

1 posted 2003-03-18 09:54 AM

Lauren,

This aches. Too often we turn others into gods...untimately they can't live up to the image, tumbling off pedestal, knocking us down again, bruising our already wounded pride and ego. You captured well how others cannot heal us and past pains can't be hidden, but will be exposed one way of another....until....???

I think the last line quite interesting and thought provoking.

Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

2 posted 2003-03-18 11:11 AM

interesting piece!

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

3 posted 2003-03-18 11:16 AM

I totally echo Pat's reply!

Warm hugs,
Earth Angel

KoKo
Senior Member

since 2003-02-15

Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow

4 posted 2003-03-18 11:40 AM

Thanks Pat, you're right, and you explained my poem perfectly. Exactly how I meant it. I'm glad people are reading my poetry and understanding it

Thank you also angel and brad!

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
--Chang Tzu

[This message has been edited by KoKo (03-19-2003 07:57 AM).]

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

5 posted 2003-03-18 04:07 PM

Enjoyed...James

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

6 posted 2003-03-18 04:41 PM

(smiles) Wow, that'd funny! I too thought of gods reading this, I think we all tend to get too hard on ourselves and never should we compare each other to others and label us in an inferior way, for true happiness begins with yourself and strength! (big hugggsssssss) This is marvelous, sweet friend, chase the light and not the tail, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Lauren, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

WhiteRose
Member Elite

since 2002-07-23

Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon

7 posted 2003-03-18 05:03 PM

A wonderful read, enjoyed.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

8 posted 2003-03-18 10:25 PM

Excellent write....much enjoyed.
~Hugs~

~ A dream is a wish your heart makes ~

WhiteRose
Member Elite

since 2002-07-23

Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon

9 posted 2003-04-08 08:26 PM

Albert J. Allie
Senior Member

since 2003-02-13

Posts 512
Queens NY

10 posted 2003-04-09 06:55 PM

Am I a fool for not seeing it
Or now knowing it but denying it?
When does this turn out right for me?
When will my old soul fight for me?

I love this part. A question we have probably asked ourselves a lot. I know I STILL do sometimes. Wonderful writing as usual. Missed it.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

11 posted 2003-04-10 11:40 AM

Ah....good!

Karilea - If I whisper, will you listen?...

Aimster
Member Elite

since 2000-02-19

Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC

12 posted 2003-04-10 11:50 AM

such a intense and powerful write! you
demonstate so well what it's like to be
hurt by someone who we thought loved us
but only to find out they never really
knew the "real" us to begin with. sometimes
i think we often see someone else as we
want them to be, not for who they really
are. and sometimes i think we see ourselves
as WE want to be, and not who we really
are. hope that makes some sort of sense.
such a great write! you definitely got my
vote. take care. and I hope to see this
one in the book. I think it would make a
really great addition.
amy

"love is like a butterfly--
if you chase it,
it will surely fly away,instead
hold it close and watch it grow into
something beautiful"
~me~

carol
Senior Member

since 2003-01-25

Posts 624
Florida USA

13 posted 2003-04-22 12:17 PM

KoKo, very sad

but great write

Real friends celebrate in who we are and have faith in all that we can become
Lots of Love
Rita

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