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1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2003-03-08 07:42 AM



Untouchable

half-past now
I realized
if I loved you
for a moment
it would last
for eternity
but I have
such fears
in the giving
and the letting go
it is not so much
doubt in you
but more of me
can you see
the unworthiness
I wear daily
under this perfume
so you wouldn’t notice
for if you did
you would be drawn
to its attention
walking by me
like some stranger
on the street
who could not bear
to look straight
in my eyes
only to prove again
that simple
and flawed
are untouchable

"Don't let the mistakes of your past be the journey of your future."


© Copyright 2003 Helen Chambers - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2003-03-08 08:23 AM



Now there's the rub...
I can't believe anyone is
untouchable, but if you have
to say so, then you did it very well,
and with class, and style...

good read, Helen.  Thank you.

DonFurr
Member
since 2001-01-01
Posts 172
Monticello IN
2 posted 2003-03-08 10:23 AM


Within the flaw of many a gem rest the secret of its brilliance.
The person that overlooks this is not worthy of the view.

"If there is any doubt about it there is no doubt about it." Linnie Stanton


Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
3 posted 2003-03-08 10:28 AM


1slick_lady
Don't agree but like the write.

Ericc
Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178

4 posted 2003-03-08 12:20 PM


Your words are so full of tender expressions.
Excellent.
Eric

Connel
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736
Florida, USA
5 posted 2003-03-08 12:22 PM


. Lovely.

Anyone can write, But only poets can capture the heart.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
6 posted 2003-03-08 12:27 PM


yea...sigh
KoKo
Senior Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow
7 posted 2003-03-08 01:08 PM


I know how this feels. You wrote this well

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
--Chang Tzu

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
8 posted 2003-03-08 01:21 PM


Helen, I liked this, but I have found that even when she has worked at making herself untouchable, someone with enough love in his heart for her could come along and pull down all the shields she's  put up.

"Love makes the world go around"
~with love and hugs from Ethel__GG~  
                  

bslicker
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-04
Posts 2321
state of mind
9 posted 2003-03-21 01:06 PM


agree with garysgirl
and it is still there
bump

A smile a day keeps the world in smile's.
Bernie Slicker

rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
10 posted 2003-03-21 01:55 PM


Oh I REALLY like. I really really like. I can definately connect to this poem...  

"it is not so much
doubt in you
but more of me
can you see
the unworthiness
I wear daily
under this perfume
so you wouldn’t notice"

I love that part... I'm so glad I stopped in to see this  

Tara


"wake me up inside
call my name and save me from the dark"
-Bring Me To Life by Evanescence

[This message has been edited by rosepetals25 (03-21-2003 01:56 PM).]

S Arthur Grey
Senior Member
since 2001-03-19
Posts 719
woven by a poet's loom
11 posted 2003-03-22 01:02 AM


Did you say "unworthy"?
tsk tsk tsk
I remember what someone told me about that . . .
(I'm not believin' ya' here)
But I like your write anyway - comes alive.

S

WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
12 posted 2003-03-22 01:19 AM


This is a wonderful write Helen. Words laced, and woven, as only you can do. I really enjoyed the read of this.
bslicker
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-04
Posts 2321
state of mind
13 posted 2003-03-22 01:38 AM


"I wear daily
under this perfume
so you wouldn’t notice
for if you did
you would be drawn
to its attention
walking by me
like some stranger
on the street"


no stranger should u ever be!!!!!
this one needs a bump eveytime some reads it

just some one that does read and write
and always enjoy every thing that u have wrote
bernie

[This message has been edited by bslicker (03-22-2003 01:42 AM).]

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