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Open Poetry #25
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Questioning the Sunset
| Open Poetry #25 |
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Questioning the Sunset |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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Questioning the Sunset Can't see the place can you where you buried the sun between number one palm and all the hues of red that is why I wear purple for you and these dragonflies of ear art dart if I turn my head to tra la la into the pewter air of dull day the metal is like a dream you're not sure you had and they are all the same from your vantage each like a shoe kicking sticks down the alley who can tell the tree it lost precious limbs now gone to under the rose bush who can break this leaf then or tell me why it is so important to cry for tender lost things like you and I It is so simple yet to explain is oil on water with rainbows and the reflection of something jaded and untrue but so beautiful like an opal stirred magic on cement trying hard to be heaven bent but falling failing to light the sky and only opening one small questioning of my wandering eye |
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| © Copyright 2003 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Phantom Poet Member
since 2003-03-03
Posts 116Arizona USA |
nice write >>phantom poet<<< |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Uh-oh, Martie's been reading Ratleader's cubist deisiderata again.....and this time a little of it rubbed off........ Careful, it might become permanent, like crossing your eyes at the hyperbrat across the aisle during Social Studies...... ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Ratleader wanders away stunned, then comes back and posts advice for other readers: Don't read this like an ordinary poem. Martie is speaking in internal, personal symbols here -- the kind of dream material that may be universal but is hard to interpret even when it comes to your own dreams..... Best is to absorb it without attempting any interpretation -- just let it pour through you and watch what it evokes on the way. That's the "meaning" here, and the symbolism. It's right down deep where it's hard to understand, but impossible not to feel. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Martie, I agree, it's right down deep and plenty good to feel. Your poetry surmounts the glorious word. hugs for you~ |
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garysgirl 
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Martie, I also read, didn't understand completely, but it felt wonderful way down deep while I was reading it. Does that make sense? Heart Hugs, Ethel |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Thank you, my friend Ed, for seeing and Lorie and Ethel, I appreciate you trying to go where I was. Just trying to write a feeling that I got after reading Ratleaders poem, Trilobite ..and some feelings are hard to write.  you all!!!! |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Ah, I was afraid you might have gotten too close to "Fading" down there in the stacks of this forum.....you'll probably recover from a Trilo- bite....... ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
that is why I wear purple for you and these dragonflies of ear art dart if I turn my head to tra la la into the pewter air of dull day the metal is like a dream you're not sure you had and they are all the same from your vantage =================================== who can break this leaf then or tell me why it is so important to cry for tender lost things like you and I It is so simple yet to explain is oil on water with rainbows and the reflection of something jaded and untrue but so beautiful like an opal stirred magic on cement trying hard to be heaven bent but falling failing to light the sky and only opening one small questioning of my wandering eye ========================================= whoa...I'll have some of what youre having  this is sooooooo coooool...so cryptic and surreal. what a heady mix of imagery, symbolism and personification...that last verse is like a tie die burst of color. very very cool...one of those writes that we dont need to know what it means to enjoy its abstract grace. How long have I been dreaming I could make it right ... |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
MArtie~ this is so very lovely and touching...  Lauren~ Take me where the tides start |
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majnu
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088SF Bay Area |
your maddening images are a jungian dreemworld. quite cool. -majnu |
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TaureauRouge Junior Member
since 2002-06-01
Posts 26A mass of land between two oceans |
"between number one palm and all the hues of red" What an incredible thought "I should have been a pair of ragged claws/ Scuttling over the floors of silent seas"-T.S. Eliot |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
mouth hanging open in poetic awe |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Each line pauses the heart to listen, to see... this! is your magic! [This message has been edited by Sunshine (03-05-2003 06:45 AM).] |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
MartiSis~ 'so simple yet to explain is oil on water with rainbows and the reflection of something jaded and untrue but so beautiful like an opal stirred magic on cement' You inspire on a moment of word-turning~ Awesome my lady .... awesome~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
and you know... the beauty of your words touches us all... always a pleasure my friend.. always a treat |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (smiles) Oh Martie, your words truly are opaline, sweet friend, they may not always be transparent but that is the true beauty of art, it is meant to be mysterious and there's so much to see in your words that make it so magical! (kiss on cheek) God Bless You, sweet friend, I love this, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Martie, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
Martie - when you write of what you feel we get to feel it and see it and wonder about it - more treasure you offer to us - thanks Paul |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
This is a little different from you Martie or is it cause it felt dream-like to me? Whichever... I absolutely love it! miss you Maree |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Loved the link I see Oh Martie, you capture the beauty of things so well, and I can only tell you in "plain English" it pleases me so to read your work. |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
wow, I was captivated. It was so real, just like I was there. the Wind is invisible. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Martie - of you, by you, only as you can write... BC |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
There are poems -- Roethke's Elegy For Jane is one -- to which it seems to be necessary for me to return from time to time, just to balance my soul. This is another of them. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
I may as well make it easy..... This is one of the poems that formed me. Elegy for Jane (My student, thrown by a horse) I remember the neckcurls, limp and damp as tendrils; And her quick look, a sidelong pickerel smile; And how, once startled into talk, the light syllables leaped for her, And she balanced in the delight of her thought, A wren, happy, tail into the wind, Her song trembling the twigs and small branches. The shade sang with her; The leaves, their whispers turned to kissing, And the mould sang in the bleached valleys under the rose. Oh, when she was sad, she cast herself down into such a pure depth, Even a father could not find her: Scraping her cheek against straw, Stirring the clearest water. My sparrow, you are not here, Waiting like a fern, making a spiney shadow. The sides of wet stones cannot console me, Nor the moss, wound with the last light. If only I could nudge you from this sleep, My maimed darling, my skittery pigeon. Over this damp grave I speak the words of my love: I, with no rights in this matter, Neither father nor lover. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> ______________Ratleader______________ |
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