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Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

0 posted 2002-03-27 04:08 PM

Day by day you learn
To ride through the rain
However long it took
For him to possess you,
But you were invisible
To the sounds, his manner
And watched as
The liquid sun set
The windows sills
In shadows of dust
And blooming flowers

How betrayed it feels
To know the stinging
Of fingertips
And the senseless way
A heart can bleed
On the brilliant, but lonely
Mondays

I have watched you
From a far
Held my hands
Out to embrace the
Warmth in you
And listen to
Wisdom consume
My most inner
Thoughts and reflections
Of happier times,
They seem to trickle
Down the window panes
From the storms lashing
And the winds upsetting
Tones

For reasons
We can not explain
We stay:
Stumbling through
Days, years, listening
To the piano player
Promise one more

Song

Greeneyes~

Step through the
barrier of my mind,
enter my soul,
feel my desire,
let my eyes guide you
into the shadows
of my heart

[This message has been edited by Greeneyes (03-27-2002 05:41 PM).]

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

1 posted 2002-03-27 04:12 PM

I find that it always helps to tip him. . .

wonderful Lauren. . . great images here. . .

---------------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Larry C

Member Patricius

since 2001-09-10

Posts 10286
United States

2 posted 2002-03-27 04:27 PM

Lauren,
If only it were a compatible tune. A longing write so haunting. Well done.

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

3 posted 2002-03-27 04:39 PM

enjoyed

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

4 posted 2002-03-27 06:28 PM

Great imagery, Lauren. Much enjoyed!

*hugs*

Stars will shine when I am gone
Earth will spin on as before
Gulls still race along the shore
Morning star, still kiss the dawn

~ M. Auguste

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

5 posted 2002-03-27 07:53 PM

(sigh) This is such a powerfully stinging poem, sweet friend, I too know that feeling of having a splinter stuck in my finger when trying to maintain metaphorically something that makes me feel special and how our melodies grow sour and haunting sadly! (kiss on cheek) This is sad but beautiful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Lauren, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

6 posted 2002-03-27 08:31 PM

I have watched you
From a far
Held my hands
Out to embrace the
Warmth in you
And listen to
Wisdom consume
My most inner
Thoughts and reflections
Of happier times,

You carry a tune so well and make your words dance (bleed) on the page.
Beautiful writing Lauren~

JAR
Junior Member

since 2001-11-06

Posts 34

7 posted 2002-03-28 12:21 PM

In my heart

Stay.
JAR

lunatic
Member

since 2001-04-20

Posts 172

8 posted 2002-03-28 12:38 PM

Play it again, Sam

Let thy moon arise. William Blake

rosepetals25

Member Elite

since 2000-05-31

Posts 3076
PA

9 posted 2002-03-28 01:01 PM

Lauren,

The more I read of you the more I like. Your words are amazing. I declare myself a fan

Hugs,
Tara

"My heart is like an open book, for the whole world to read"
- Motley Crue, Home Sweet Home

Verve
Member

since 1999-06-23

Posts 348
Singapore

10 posted 2002-03-28 01:19 PM

Nice!

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

11 posted 2002-03-28 01:24 PM

Lauren, dear, I miss your words.....this is beautiful...

On the wings of words our spirits fly....and our souls are free.
~Me~

(I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance~Garth)

Opeth
Senior Member

since 2001-12-13

Posts 1543
The Ravines

12 posted 2002-03-28 01:27 PM

I could Billy Joel playing in the background. I was going to place in quotation marks my favorite part of this fine piece of writing, but then I realized that I would have to copy the entire poem.

Most enjoyable.

Victoria

Member Ascendant

since 2000-08-12

Posts 5869

13 posted 2002-03-28 01:57 PM

The liquid sun set
The windows sills
In shadows of dust
And blooming flowers

beautifully written my friend.. hugss..loved your tender words lauren

~Victoria

RosePetal

Member Elite

since 2001-08-26

Posts 2985
South Florida

14 posted 2002-03-28 02:31 PM

i love your use of imagery! Very good write!
Did I also mention that you have a beautiful smile

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

15 posted 2002-03-28 11:35 PM

Gorgeous imagery, Lauren...

And watched as
The liquid sun set
The windows sills
In shadows of dust
And blooming flowers

You really know what to do with those words

~hugs~

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

16 posted 2002-03-28 11:57 PM

For reasons
We can not explain
We stay:
Stumbling through
Days, years, listening
To the piano player
Promise one more

Song
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lauren!! You just knew I would love this!! Fantastic! Oh my...a keeper for sure! Hugs.

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Ivy Rose
Senior Member

since 2001-12-29

Posts 1300
MA, USA

17 posted 2002-03-29 12:55 PM

Greeneyes...This poem a sparkling gem lighting up the heart with its beauty. Though it may not show the positive side of love, it shows a true picture of many who have fallen in and out of love.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

18 posted 2002-03-29 07:02 AM

what can one say, but wonderful writing especially the ending.

*s

M

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

19 posted 2002-03-29 09:39 PM

Wow Lauren, this is awesome...and the ending
is ever so perfect....Yes, sometimes we sit
and wait....but hear the same old song...

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

20 posted 2002-03-29 10:35 PM

You captured me with this one, Lauren, so beatifully written and the piano played out your feeling skillfully. Much enjoyed!

Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

21 posted 2002-03-30 06:51 PM

Love to all, thank you for responding so kindly....

Lauren~

~Greeneyes~

Step through the
barrier of my mind,
enter my soul,
feel my desire,
let my eyes guide you
into th

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