»
Sanctuary
»
Poetic Haven
»
not quite life
| Poetic Haven |
|
not quite life |
|
|
Tramp Poet Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 754Could Be Anywhere... 
|
Not Quite Life Days roll like thunder crashing into ‘morrows the storm ever upon. Darkness coiled to strike fangs glisten with promise poison injected deeply. World gone gray sunlight simply banished assembly line life. Sand in the hourglass beach prisoned away sentenced; serving time. Safely inside numbness pain, anguish, terror locked away, far away. Unfortunately... with that banishment so goes love and joy. The storm rages detached eye observing winds whipping...demented. Cocoon of numbness protecting the fragile not quite called life. |
||
| © Copyright 2003 Daniel James Burt - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
World gone gray sunlight simply banished assembly line life. Sand in the hourglass beach prisoned away sentenced; serving time. ======================== It would be like serving time to not have the ocean and beaches... Enjoyed the stark vivid imagery in this melancholy write. well done poet sir.  "How could I stand here with you and not be moved by you." |
||
|
gemjop Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587Pencilveinia, USA |
The storm rages detached eye observing winds whipping...demented. Cocoon of numbness protecting the fragile not quite called life.  I've never read you before, so this was like love at first sight..lol..That last stanza in particular..just wow..into my library.hope to read more of you. gem Instant karma's gonna get you. |
||
Marshalzu  
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
This is absoloutely delightful reading thank you for sharing this with us, I really enjoyed reading this. Andy |
||
|
Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Whoa, spend more than a few minutes in -that- place and you can tell how hard it is to get out again...very creepy poem, loved the images and landscapes. "Darkness coiled to strike fangs glisten with promise poison injected deeply." Just thought that was brilliant. ~Carly "How inimitably graceful children are in general before they learn to dance!" |
||
|
Tramp Poet Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 754Could Be Anywhere... |
thank y'all for the comments... lol my work has definately taken a turn, eh? wondering should i lament or sigh and get on with it? either way it sux... |
||
|
Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
I have a soft spot for the gloomier stuff. This kept my attention due to the intriguing level of unique imagery you chose... it indeed painted a very abstract picture of the not quite life, really accurately... well done Tramp Poet, I think this is among the best I've read from you. Parasite Faith is a fine invention |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
