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fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958


0 posted 2003-02-17 11:53 PM


The bright morning sun rises early,
her mate our mother world of Pryna lags
not far behind, her limb a glint of gold
within a cooled sea of darkened blue.

The livened rocks of our newly created world
embrace the warmth and light of both old globes
and work begins anew, the bots churning
and harvesting ores and metals fit for use.

     I feel out of place...
     Thinker among the workers...
     But now we all think...

One hundred years before this moon
was not alone, but held a sister
close in hand.  They drifted proudly
over our complacent heads.

     How it must have been...
     To give that awful order...
     Now Trei drifts alone...

"If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"

-- Magus

© Copyright 2003 fractal007 - All Rights Reserved
Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
1 posted 2003-02-26 12:31 PM


OOh eerie... makes me really curious what this is about.  One of your sci-fiesque works I take it?  I like the idea of a newly created world, and the statement "now we all think."  I've pondered on that myself... once we have machines to do all the work for us, what will we be left to do?  Nothing but thinking and remembering, or enjoying ourselves.  Might make us lazy, or alternately, as you describe, might make us ponderous and reflective.

Good use of atmosphere in this poem... the tone was very well set at an early stage and I read this through smoothly and as though spoken.  Very cool work.

Parasite

"Faith" means the will to avoid knowing what is true.
~ Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

2 posted 2003-03-07 06:41 PM


"I like the idea of a newly created world, and the statement "now we all think."  I've pondered on that myself... once we have machines to do all the work for us, what will we be left to do?  Nothing but thinking and remembering, or enjoying ourselves.  Might make us lazy, or alternately, as you describe, might make us ponderous and reflective."

That's basically it, though with an emphasis on the pondering and reflection.  Thanks for the reply.

"If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"
-- Magus
"there is no good and evil, there are just sides."
-- Local Parasite

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