»
Sanctuary
»
Poetic Haven
»
A couple a haiku..
| Poetic Haven |
|
A couple a haiku.. |
|
|
Yu Lan Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462New Zealand 
|
Ok, I wrote these in English, 'coz we are studying a few different forms of poetry for a portfolio of poetry we have to submitt (yay! Sounds fun,  )oh, yeah, they have no names.. but they really are quite unrelated to each other.. Dancing on blue stage A piruette in soft breath Autumn in the trees. (How do u spell piruette?! ie ballet) Swiss cheese sand Winces as little fingers Block shellfish breaths. Exploring fingers Pudgy in the gritty sand Find rubbish treasures. “One word can be magical. Imagine then, the effect of several words, together..” |
||
| © Copyright 2001 Lynne Miura, née Chudley - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
hi there. . .  p-i-r-o-u-e-t-t-e I like these. . . nothing like studying the forms!! ---------------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
||
|
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I like these....nicely done Yu. *looks at the pic and drools*  hehe I liked these..yea. |
||
|
Yu Lan Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462New Zealand |
Thanks Sven.. hehe, yep I'm not a particularly grate spelar..  Thanx Javi, um I think... uh.. yeaahh... |
||
|
Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Heh, I agree, you are cute. These haikus weren't written in the 5-7-5 format that I'm used to, however if you were studying the format then I won't question you, but I'll ask - is there something I'm not aware of here? Well enough of that, these were all really well done. I like the second one best. Keep up the good work, Yu Lan ~Allan The children of the nobility are playing here. they look up at you with disgust as you come near. |
||
|
Yu Lan Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462New Zealand |
Thanks Allan.. Yes, the second one is not actually a traditional haiku, it's more like what my English teacher was lookng for, as in a short line, a longer line, a short line, with not so much emphasis on the syllables.. but no, hehe, haiku is still 5-7-5, I didn't change the formatt. ^_^Thanking u muchly for your comments, Lynne Nothing in life, if you study it close enough, and long enough, makes sense. But only once you have understood why it doesn’t make sense, can you be s |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
