I meant to paint a fantasy

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walker
Member Elite

since 2001-02-11

Posts 2240
Florida

0 posted 2001-11-22 12:29 PM

Sorry for the intrusion
I should have painted
a less familiar face
the words
the way to love
the expression
too common for me
Came out wrong
and I'm sorry
indeed
I'm not a crafted artist
my brush succumbed
to too much paint
it tilted on my hands
making uneven lines
and creating a mess
I offer my apologies
for too many
similarities
for trying to depict
fantasy
and ending up with
what appears to be reality

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

1 posted 2001-11-22 12:37 PM

This is very interesting, made me think of watercolor and the emotion that goes into that...I enjoyed this.

Kathleen

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant

since 2000-03-16

Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA

2 posted 2001-11-22 01:00 PM

Sometimes we are better off with the fantasy. All too often the reality doesn't seem to live up.

All writing comes
by the grace of God.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2001-11-22 03:58 PM

I have this annoying habit of repeating a word when I like something...

this is good... good good good good good!

dgvarner
Member Elite

since 2000-05-13

Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida

4 posted 2001-11-22 04:15 PM

oh this is awesome!! i love this too much!

most wonderful writing!

hugs, g

~dgvarner/fallen rain~

"tomorrow's another day, and i'm thirsty anyway--so bring on the rain!"

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

5 posted 2001-11-22 04:55 PM

You are, indeed, a crafted poet and a good friend. A bit goofy, maybe...part of the charm of your poetry.

Charisma

Member Ascendant

since 2000-09-30

Posts 5906
lost in blue pages

6 posted 2001-11-22 05:08 PM

Like it very, very much!!!

~*Theresia~*

Tracey
Member Elite

since 2001-08-29

Posts 2808
where insanity meets breeding

7 posted 2001-11-22 05:39 PM

Somehow, I think I know just what you mean here. There are many layers to your painting, your poetry. It makes one think

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

Honeybee
Member Ascendant

since 1999-12-26

Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA

8 posted 2001-11-22 11:30 PM

This is great writing, I really liked the creative way you used this theme

Take care,
Melissa

"Poetry is not an opinion expressed...
it is a song that rises from a bleeding
wound...or a smiling mouth"

~Kahlil Gibran~

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

9 posted 2001-11-22 11:52 PM

yes, fantasy can be beautiful and reality can be ugly but kudos to the painter that can make the reality beautiful...

I enjoy the way you crafted this poem, good sir

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