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Open Poetry #17
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The Street Part 3
| Open Poetry #17 |
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The Street Part 3 |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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His life as it was had ended on his 45th birthday. It had been the ice cream. We can’t have cake without ice cream, vanilla ice cream he told his wife. You go, it was his birthday after all, he would sit on the porch and wait into the afternoon. Another reason lurked. He was drinking and what he really wanted was to sit on the porch with another beer, not ice cream and drink into the afternoon. His son of blond thatched hair had exchanged a blue eyed look with his mother, a look of disappointment, resignation and something else disgust, he thought. They never came back, a drunk driver’s final irony. After the blissful numbness, a wave so powerful, so full of grinding pain hit him that he wished that he was dead. It fell on him ripped through his fabric of pretension found his soul and squeezed it hard. He screamed, tore a chunk of hair from his head, then took a hammer searching for his tormentor and found him in the bedroom in front of the bathroom door. He took a hammer to the full length reflection of himself until only small shards of glass remained scattered on the teal carpet. ________ part 3 of this story-poem is a repost ______________________ part 1 /pip/Forum52/HTML/000368.html part 2 /pip/Forum52/HTML/000420.html [This message has been edited by Martie (edited 11-19-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Carol Lina Member
since 2001-11-18
Posts 94USA |
This is quite powerful storytelling in verse, I mean it, very striking. Carolina |
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Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
Oh my gosh......how heartbreaking. I am stunned. Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
How very sad...no wonder he became such a tormented soul. Great writing as usual Martie....I await the next in the series. ~hugs, Nancy~ ~I've loved you forever, in lifetimes before.~ |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Yes, I remember this one. I like how you went back and made a part 1 and a part 2. Very creative writing, Martie! |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Hauntingly powerful write, Martie. A story that sadly is true for some. Very well written. All writing comes |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Wow, can you tell a story. His whole life wrapped in a few lines. Very well done, my friend Liz |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
It might be a repost, but it fits perfectly into the series, and I don't recall having read it before.... powerful, my girl....very powerful.... |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Nicely done martie...the entire series is quite a tale and one well told... |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Martie~ Just wonderfully done ... I find your talents awe-inspiring~  Love n' Hugs~ ~Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Excellent Martie, just excellent! ~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~ |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Wow! Powerful is definately the right word for this one. "Let me pierce the realm of glamour |
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