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Open Poetry #17
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Hourglass
| Open Poetry #17 |
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Hourglass |
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GenXer Senior Member
since 2001-12-15
Posts 583USA |
All the sand has fallen, it is time to say goodbye Beneath this newly formed desert is where my body now lies The sandstorm that lasted a lifetime has finally come to an end I’m moving on to a placid state where my thirsty heart can mend So these eyes that created streams can now rest in blissful peace Their sentence has been served It’s time for them to be released And so all the rivers that ran are now just about dry, and all the sand has fallen, it is time I say goodbye © David 2001 [This message has been edited by GenXer (12-30-2001 03:49 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 GenXer - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
very sad poem-- I would rather think of leaving the desert with head held high having survived to find my own oasis here on earth-- take care, Jamie There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar. |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Lovely poem, I picture the hourglass emptying for the person. Good imagery If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
with every grain counted, in tears, the rivers yet flow I hear you say goodbye but I don't want you to go...... I like this very much  |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Dave darling boy How absolutely first rate is this? It's incredible, YOU are a fabulous writer. YES you are and don't argue, I told you I'll be round if you do. This is so full of amazing imagery, I love it. As always sad darling boy, I'm going to have to find some way to bring back those poems that I really love. I want to have some more of your special Moontown smiles. Pretty please.    Love and warm stuff As always Mushy To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace St John ch2 v1 |
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amusemi Senior Member
since 2001-12-08
Posts 1262A State of Disarray |
This is such a fitting piece for this time of year...what with the end of the year and all. Here is where I could see the hope though... "So these eyes that created streams can now rest in blissful peace" Goodbyes are sometimes the best thing we could ever do. Cool job! |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Beautiful imagery here, Dave...but very sad and so haunting. And so all the rivers that ran are now just about dry, and all the sand has fallen, it is time I say goodbye If you don't mind my saying so, you are much too sarcastic  to be writing such beautiful words.  copyright2001 Lyra Nesius |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
there are indeed some very powerful images here. . . well done. . . ------------------------------------------------------ To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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GenXer Senior Member
since 2001-12-15
Posts 583USA |
Jamie - So would I. Thanks for reading. Tracey - Thank you for reading and commenting. Sea - I like the stanza you put together. It is a good rebuttal to this write. Marsha - I will argue with you if I want to, but I won't. You enjoy turning my face red, don't you.  Amusemi - You are definitely more of an optimist then I am.lol Actually, I didn't think about that, but there is some hope to be found in those lines. Thanks for reading. Lyra - Actually, I have split personalities. The person that writes is different from the person that replies.lol Sven - Thanks for checking this out. Dave [This message has been edited by GenXer (12-30-2001 11:44 PM).] |
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