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catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

0 posted 2001-10-20 12:14 PM

You are the breath within my body
you are the beat within my heart
you are the soul which lives inside me
you are the home I dread to part.

I am the heart inside your hardness
I am your love unrecognized
I am the heat that leaves you melting
I am the one you fantasized.

We are the two who make the music
we are the ones who could go far
we are the two apart-together
we should be one-a blazing star..

wayoutwalt
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)

1 posted 2001-10-20 12:15 PM

a super nova of a poem and yuh you should!

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

2 posted 2001-10-20 12:18 PM

(smiles) Oh my gosh, this is soooooooo beautiful, sweet Sandra! He is everything to you, and your love is everything to him, and may your loving hearts forever be singing with sweet love! (big hugggssssss) Your lovely words are always so inspiring! Have a beautiful day, sweet friend! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Sandra, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

3 posted 2001-10-20 12:24 PM

"I am the heart inside your hardness
I am your love unrecognized
I am the heat that leaves you melting
I am the one you fantasized."

Beautifully written Sandra! Wonderful cadence and rhyme, and lovely phrasing and sentiments ... very much enjoyed!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

4 posted 2001-10-20 12:34 PM

We are the two who make the music
we are the ones who could go far
we are the two apart-together
we should be one-a blazing star..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yes Sandra, you should be together! This is very beautiful. Enjoyed, Nancy.

~Time has cast a spell on you,
So that you won't ever forget me.~

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

5 posted 2001-10-20 01:31 PM

Beautifully tender and passionate read here, my friend. You express some wonderful feelings here. Nice job!

Michael

Michael Auguste~
There is more depth to the heart than the mind can comprehend and it only has boundaries when we choose to fence it in.

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

6 posted 2001-10-20 01:46 PM

Oh, this is gorgeous! I love that ending.

'we are the two apart-together
we should be one-a blazing star..'

MyEnchanted_Melody
Senior Member

since 2001-05-30

Posts 1106
across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be.

7 posted 2001-10-20 02:44 PM

Wow.....this is soooo beautiful and heartfelt.

I've found the following lines particularly captivating

"I am the heart inside your hardness
I am your love unrecognized"

Thank you & Welcome back..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite

since 2001-06-21

Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...

8 posted 2001-10-20 03:11 PM

Sandra: I think you may very well have the start to a song here! Sounds to me like lyric material -- the first verse and a pre-chorus... Now you just need a killer chorus, another verse, and perhaps a simple bridge, and you'll have yourself a song ready for a good melody. Very musical!

-MVS

"Learn to let go of fear, doubt, and disbelief..." --THE MATRIX

http://www.davidicke.com/icke/index1c.html

DawnG

Senior Member

since 2000-06-23

Posts 1494
United States

9 posted 2001-10-20 03:41 PM

Sandra,

This is a beautiful poem. I'm sure your love is just as beautiful as your words describing it.

Dawn

Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

10 posted 2001-10-20 06:27 PM

BRAVO!!!!Music sings through this poem making it a perfect delight to read. I LOVE IT!!!

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

jonmcm
Member

since 2000-10-11

Posts 222
England

11 posted 2001-10-20 06:40 PM

"we are the two apart-together
we should be one-a blazing star.."

I love these lines, for me they cunjure two people who have that passionate physical attraction, yet, there is something lacking to ignite that 'blazing star'. The poem seems to tell of a one sided love; an experience that many have tasted.

Nice one
Jon

ctowen
Member Elite

since 2001-10-18

Posts 2286
Green Mountains of VT

12 posted 2001-10-20 07:42 PM

Brillant and Everlasting !!!
You captured so much in a few simple words ..., they are blinding yet visible !!

Excellent perception!!! **s**

Honeybee
Member Ascendant

since 1999-12-26

Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA

13 posted 2001-10-20 08:40 PM

You know I love this!

Wonderfully expressed, Sandra..*sighs*

Take care,
Melissa~

"Poetry is not an opinion expressed...
it is a song that rises from a bleeding
wound...or a smiling mouth"

~Kahlil Gibran~

Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite

since 2000-01-30

Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London

14 posted 2001-10-20 10:05 PM

The last two lines just seem to echo your thoughts within this one
Lovely thoughts here Sandra

Tracey
Member Elite

since 2001-08-29

Posts 2808
where insanity meets breeding

15 posted 2001-10-21 12:29 PM

Oh Sandra, this is indeed a gorgeous piece you have written. Welcome back, we've missed you these last few days. Hugs

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

16 posted 2001-10-26 04:52 AM

Sandra-
   Enjoyed this, my friend.
   Beautifully penned.
   Hugs,
   ~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

cottage
Member

since 2001-06-21

Posts 138

17 posted 2001-10-26 06:22 AM

such a passionate one here!

lunatic
Member

since 2001-04-20

Posts 172

18 posted 2001-10-26 09:20 AM

you could be a moon
shining for all the lovers
yourself included

Let thy moon arise. William Blake

SmartChick
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-09-23

Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown

19 posted 2001-10-26 09:49 AM

This is a beautiful poem. I just love it.

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