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Open Poetry #15
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She left her hand imprints
| Open Poetry #15 |
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She left her hand imprints |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland 
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For Dawn she left her hand imprints powdered serene blue, below a solstice moon. She left her hand imprints Whispering love lines Of our destiny entwined. She left her hand imprints threading torn loneliness, with the tides of her bliss. "Here I am in prison,here I am with a ball and chain There is whiskey in the jar-o" Traditional irish song. |
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| © Copyright 2001 brian madden - All Rights Reserved | |||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
nice imagery and form Brian... I enjoyed |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Very nice, Brian. Effective emotional write. Sandra |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Brian- Very nicely penned..  Really enjoyed reading this. hugs, ~vicky "...until you have read the verse on his |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
at first I thought she'd slapped you!!!  But it's early yet, isn't it? LOL..She should love this one Brian, beneath a solstice moon...what are you guys doing for Lammas anyway? |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
Brian...if Dawn doesn't like it....just know that there are others who do.... this is wonderful, and has a heartfelt quality.... Ah yes... some more, soon, please.... |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Well lookey here. *Peace Brian, this is special.  . |
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wandering glider Senior Member
since 2001-04-04
Posts 501aloft |
"with the tides of her bliss." Nice line |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
powdered serene blue, below a solstice moon. She left her hand imprints Whispering love lines Of our destiny entwined. ========================= Ahhh the "romantic fool" muse returns this is lovely in both phrasing and intend. me thinks there are some heart imprints as well *S* beautiful Bri...truly eve When your own emptiness is all thats getting through |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
...she loves this..you constantly amaze her. maybe one day she will find her voice again and serenade you in such a beautiful way. ~Dawn |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
lovely. No crit. It really is lovely Bri. (Ok one thing - not comfy with the last line...the whole bliss things...sounds rhyme-forced with imprints...) me shut up now..  KI am a refugee of logic...insisting |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Cpat, thanks. Sandra, thank you kindly. Vicky, thanks. Seren, LOL, maybe but I ain't saying a poem about that would be in adult. LOL. YOu know shame on me I am going to have to research Wiccian beliefs, seeing as it has celtic orgins. Thanks Lady, I am praying that she does, and if not then we are going to have to have a few words. More? well my muse and I are kind of at each others throats at the moment. Thanks. SF, blushing, you caught me being emotional. wandering glider, thanks. Jan, OH She left a BIG IMPRINT there. thanks.Dawn, well my intended audience is here. You have a sense for my romantic thoughts. Of course you do when they are calling your name. I am waiting patiently for her voice, and until she does she is going to made very guilty by all the poetry being written for her. My thanks come in private K, I see your point, when my muse lets me I will fix it. Thanks. |
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