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Open Poetry #15
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too tired to title
| Open Poetry #15 |
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too tired to title |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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"anger is the voice of pain" with surety of judge's gavel (this song cannot remain the same.) you thought corrupt are in my heart-- that's true enough. Each of them I do confess, result of desperate loneliness. spawned in death of hope each night. that dammed the river pulsing free. You built walls--your hallowed halls a haunting by the pace of feet. I understand. I, too, want more... No touch of hand, just promise of amber eyes, smile sun to me-- a glitter found amid debris. discovered joy of Understand. in strangled breath I gasp to live. One lucid thought in brain of dim-- this is how it is with him. last in line--formation's vee-- I let the strong take place of lead-- conserving but my strength to sing. |
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| © Copyright 2001 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
serenity- oh yes...you DO sing..beautifully, and with a loud, strong voice.  you've expressed some very painful and confusing emotions very well here. I hope it all works out for the best. great big hugs, ~vicky "...until you have read the verse on his |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
I am speechless left in awe again my goodness gurl this write touched me Hugs2uAlways *~coco~* |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
the flow is fantastic, the moood dark and painful, I love the last stanza so much, the last of the vee, giving up the lead may the leader be a fine one while you gather your strength to sing |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
All the things you thought corrupt are in my heart-- that's true enough. Each of them I do confess, result of desperate loneliness. =============================== Yet, this time, it was not me that dammed the river pulsing free. You built walls--your hallowed halls a haunting by the pace of feet. A restless search for open door-- I understand. I, too, want more... It's easy, now, to fall in love. No touch of hand, just promise of amber eyes, smile sun to me-- a glitter found amid debris. A wanderer has found new land-- discovered joy of Understand. ========================================= A tired bird adrift in wing-- last in line--formation's vee-- I let the strong take place of lead-- conserving but my strength to sing. ========================================== can a tired moth fly with you? MIRRORS BABY...BIG BIG MIRRORS... on the walls..one the ceilings...... *sigh*  meWhen your own emptiness is all thats getting through |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I felt that anger and pain! Janet picked the lines I felt established the poem's strength, and, I think the duck at the end of the V is the one that will come out of this eventually the stronger and a  to you too, sweet serenity. Fantastic write.I hope you still feel small when you stand by the ocean, and when you get a chance to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance ~Lee Ann Womack~ |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Oh me Sista, I love every single line from this darkly painful poem. I have to say my sweet that YOU ROCK! There's no doubt about that! Maree "little miss understood |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
your talent astounds me...helen |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
well done... I enjoyed |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Nope, I guarantee this time it was not your fault. This stanza is particularly effective "It's easy, now, to fall in love. No touch of hand, just promise of amber eyes, smile sun to me-- a glitter found amid debris." Take care-go to sleep Sandra |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
A really nice write Titia A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess... |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
I see in such fraility another side...resiliency. Enjoyed "Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to decieve" |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
But not too tired to regale us with your work, thank God |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Didn't mean to be rude, so I hopped in to thank everyone...and lol, sorry about the title, but I was suffering from brain sprain at that point...but thanks again friends!!! Hugs to all... |
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