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Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

0 posted 2001-09-09 10:57 PM

this is for a writing assignment ( writing a poem based on one of your favorites- in this case "listen to the warm" by rod mckuen )

One of those Tuesdays

      away from you

we wondered if time would

ever see us together again.

We drove these hills

when the only greenness

     was beside me

and a part of you.

     I was a coward

for not telling you

     I love you

until you were harboured

in your city of sails

Now I am sure

only of changing tides

with shifting winds

  and of my summer’s end

even as yours begins

So when you are listening

to your warm

I’ll have my collar up

and my back turned

in trying to

ignore the cold.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

1 posted 2001-09-09 11:15 PM

Jamie~
This is marvelously penned.
You've taken the 'word master' a step further ~
Greatly enjoyable.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2001-09-09 11:23 PM

Love it! Love it!! Love it!!

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

3 posted 2001-09-09 11:52 PM

sadly penned, and so regretful too...
But I loved the imagery...wonderfully written Jamie.

Severn
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-17

Posts 7704

4 posted 2001-09-10 12:44 PM

J - this is superb. I love the format and the minimalism...

you've improved...you have...

and I can't comment on the content right now...bit choked you know.

K aka the green moon.

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

5 posted 2001-09-10 01:07 AM

Jamsey, WOW! You have me speechless dear.
This is superb! outstanding!
An incredible write in it's sadness.

Hugs

MeeMee

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

6 posted 2001-09-10 01:41 AM

Jamie, wow, this is so fantastic, I really like the way this felt.....

Saunni
Senior Member

since 2000-07-11

Posts 1777
West Virginia

7 posted 2001-09-10 01:48 AM

Jamie, just AWESOME!

Sauni @~~~>~~

The Sun Shines
Not On Us, But In Us
The River Flows Not Past,
But Through Us

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

8 posted 2001-09-10 01:53 AM

adding to my library

CocoBaci
Member Elite

since 2000-05-06

Posts 3043

9 posted 2001-09-10 02:01 AM

Beautifully penned and a most touching read...

Thank you for sharing...
*~coco~*

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

10 posted 2001-09-10 03:42 PM

I am short on time- so please let me by with one big Thanks!! for each of you... hope to reply later... thanks again....

J

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

11 posted 2001-09-10 05:19 PM

Had to have another read, still incredible!

Maree

shadow974
Senior Member

since 2001-06-21

Posts 636
Michigan

12 posted 2001-09-10 05:24 PM

Wonderfully done and masterfully done enjoyed much.

Throw your heart out in front of you
And run out to catch it.
ARAB PROVERB

Charisma

Member Ascendant

since 2000-09-30

Posts 5906
lost in blue pages

13 posted 2001-09-10 05:38 PM

Beautiful penned!

Charisma

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

14 posted 2001-09-10 09:04 PM

Can we ever make sense of the ups and downs of love?
Nicely penned, Jamie...

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