Open Poetry #15 |
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sacred words inside |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738![]() |
Here I am again... before you on my knees in bend I raise my palms unto the sky and whisper sacred words inside. Answer me, your lowly slave-- I am desperate--I'm not brave. But please don't turn your back on me-- the only ears to hear my plea. Take my pride for it's no cloak. Take the words on which I choke. Remove the salt within my tears pour it on the ice of fears... Can't you remember how it was? In the flesh, material... "Mercy" in my scream surreal, upon my knees in finalty a flag of white between my teeth a clasp of hands in prayer's relief should my rage become my cage I beg of you that you not fade and from your presence be denied... for every day, each day I die. |
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© Copyright 2001 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
I don't know what to say. This is an incredible write. Took reading it several times, then it hit me, hard. |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
This is very powerful. Very, very well written. I hear those screams. Incredibly well done If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
This is lovely, K... I like this line best "Remove the salt within my tears pour it on the ice of fears... ![]() |
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SEA![]() ![]()
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
ya know, I think I'll just keep this one...... |
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Charisma![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
incredible write indeed! excellent work. Charisma |
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bslicker![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-04
Posts 2321state of mind |
This was great, and now in the library ![]() A smile a day keeps the world in smile's. |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Terrific writing here Serenity Sweetie... hugs2UalwaysPoetFriend *~coco~* |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I wanted to say thanks to all and once again, I appreciate your patience with me as I change Internet services once again...Ya'll know me, gotta try everything...sigh ![]() |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Take my pride for it's no cloak. Take the words on which I choke. Remove the salt within my tears pour it on the ice of fears... Can't you remember how it was? In the flesh, material... "Mercy" in my scream surreal, upon my knees in finalty a flag of white between my teeth a clasp of hands in prayer's relief should my rage become my cage I beg of you that you not fade and from your presence be denied... for every day, each day I die. ============================ ahhh me queen of rhyme divine...me twin of mirrors...me poetess of metaphor and imagery...me girliegirl of emote and evoke. Im *shaking me head* at you again... ![]() hearthugs on this one baby.. |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
I'm not sure if I've said this before, but you've got such a style with words that just amazes me...the way you express emotions is brilliant...this being no exception...fantastic and powerful write, serenity! sp ![]() tried to write a letter |
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The Rusty Knight Member
since 2001-08-29
Posts 414Texas |
I like the feel and rhythem of this, but unlike Duncan it has not hit me yet...but I'm slow...I'll catch the train, but maybe not till the second stop. Death comes not when we cease to breathe, but when we cease to dream. |
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SmittenKitten Senior Member
since 2001-06-20
Posts 1131where the sky and horizon meet |
Sacred words indeed...as all your words are. Fabulous flow, full of your rhyming ease! Hugs, ~Krista ![]() "Poetry and Hums aren't things which you get, they're things which get you. |
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Cpat Hair![]()
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
powerful... and so very well done. I am impressed. I am also touched... could feel this one... had a couple of thoughts on replies...and decided best to simply say I enjoyed |
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