Open Poetry #15 |
Way Down On The Rainy Street |
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
you're just a shadow in the dark and the rain's fallin hard lookin through the window you see everything you're standin on a ledge with your anger on the edge there's a knife wound in your heart they do the pleasure thing you wanna throw him down way on down to the rainy street now you're flyin through the air t'ward the startled stares crashin through a wall of glass and rain in sheets too much hurt and you're impaired you'll go anywhere and that's your only love givin him your heat you wanna throw him down way on down to the rainy street now you're settlin some scores as he falls against the door the blood is flowin out and he begins to weep you drag him through the door on the balconied twelfth floor and he struggles to resist he screams his beggin piece you wanna throw him down way on down to the rainy street oh she screams a helpless scream caught in the crazy scene you grip him with your best the iron grip of death he's startin to choke and his eyes grow weak and he's fightin for his breath but you sentence him no less you wanna throw him down way on down to the rainy street a crowd gathers to the door they're knockin with a force but you got a driven goal you're conquering his soul your eyes are red with war and you can't hear anymore you can feel your anger grow over the sirens down below you're gonna throw him down way on down to the rainy street then she pulls against your neck and beats upon your breast "please don't send him to the street I brought him here with me God knows I did my very best to put our love to rest the same love you gave to me and then left me here in grief don't throw him down way on down to the rainy street!" the wind blows the rain in swirling savage sheets way on down.. way on down... on the rainy street.... they cuff you while you weep...way on down...way on down © on the rainy street..........fade Eric True The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up spaces of consciousness and resistance; to language oppressions; to re-language historie [This message has been edited by ethome (edited 09-01-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved | |||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Everything you write just SINGS to me!!!! How this flows, E....one of these days, we are going to have to have a "jam session" Hugs to you... captivating as always |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thanks Celeste.....Maybe we'll end up being a Marquis act in New Orleans..... ET and Celeste sing their best....imagine that! |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Oh, I just love this. So many strong images are invoked. I just love it Tracey If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
Been there, gets expensive, lawyers, bond, court costs, fines, restitution, divorce. While the few moments of vengence lift a burden the lifelong case you carry outweighs it. Hindsight? Not worth it, would have been so much better off battering with words. Good job. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Ethome, Well done with a fine palette. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
ethome---What a well done explore of the dark side of human emotion. I hear the blues in this. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
now you're settlin some scores as he falls against the door the blood is flowin out and he begins to weep you drag him through the door on the balconied twelfth floor and he struggles to resist he screams his beggin piece you wanna throw him down way on down to the rainy street oh she screams a helpless scream caught in the crazy scene you grip him with your best the iron grip of death he's startin to choke and his eyes grow weak and he's fightin for his breath but you sentence him no less you wanna throw him down way on down to the rainy street =========================== as soon as I saw the title I knew you waz gonna wail us some bluuuuueezzz very cool write E-babes... melancholoy melodies...heartache harmonies I can hear Muddy and BB whining this one long and low...with Van laying down some harmonica Sing it to us poetpal!! "Failure is not in the falling down ... |
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SmittenKitten Senior Member
since 2001-06-20
Posts 1131where the sky and horizon meet |
Wowee...what rhythm and blues! Love the flow of this E-man powerful powerful words. Hugs, ~Krista "Poetry and Hums aren't things which you get, they're things which get you. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Eric this is substantially nice...James |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Jealously and rage are the curses of the ages that savagely rip apart every single heart that is touched by the forces of jealousy and rage, the kind you so adeptly wrote of on this very page A cathartic poem, Eric and True |
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MARK V SHELDON Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015In a corporeal internship... |
An exotically different write with storytelling imagery and "role-playing" emotions. Very strong work here, Eric. -MVS "It's all in the details -- the Big Picture always takes care of itself." |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
Outstanding work my friend...as always! ((hugs)) Charisma |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
ETHome~ You know I enjoy your musical verse~ Very much I like this~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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walker Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240Florida |
Strong images here, great poem. |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
Eric, I had to read this a couple of times to get the full impact. Very strong. I, too, love the blues. So it's a keeper. Dee I wish you every happiness and may you always have the best of the good things in life. a brand |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
We can only hope to someday visit your area and catch you in the midst of your songs... well done Sir... |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
I was just waiting for the body to fly by the window! Your style of writing is very different. I like it alot. |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoy |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Hey sweet poet man...yes I can hear you singing this song...fantastic as always |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thanks to all who have commented on this piece. I really appreciate it so very much. I will get back to you by commenting on your work! Thanks again! |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
ethome, this one reads like words to a Springsteen tune......good work!! Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thank you so much Nightshade and Passings Shadows I appreciate that you have taken the time to read this....Have a nice day!! |
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The Rusty Knight Member
since 2001-08-29
Posts 414Texas |
I can not put rage into a poem and envious of those who can...I'm envious *S* Death comes not when we cease to breath, but when we cease to dream. |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
Wow, powerful plaintive song, lots of agony here..only phrase I had trouble understanding was 'beggin piece' I'm wondering if you meant 'peace' or if I'm reading the context wrong. |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thank you...The Rusty Knight! Wasn't trying to make you envious!! |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thanks Virginia I appreciate the comments! You must have snuck in on me when I was replying to Rusty Knight! Thanks again! |
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