navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #5 » evening stream of thought.
Teen Poetry #5
Post A Reply Post New Topic evening stream of thought. Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
haydenjames
Member
since 2002-02-14
Posts 164
Antigua & Barbuda

0 posted 2002-04-04 08:13 PM


evening stream of thought.

the sun sinks quietly beneath the horizon.
flowers shout with the fading touch of grace.
stars begin to appear as if looking for the sun.
the touch of darkened air surreal to taste.

fingers of life's cycle must continue to clench.
enclosing the answers to questions, conjecture it flows.
eyes wide open as if my insides were in wench.
yet a mellow is reaped from the smell etched in my nose.

it's of lilies white, with hints of green and yellow.
relinquishing the ebb of irksome daylight's deeds.
resuming the joint purpose of how it - life - seems to go.
another night of desires, imaginings, aspirations and needs.

©2002 hayden a. james

My poetry is at:  http://www.thehayden.org

© Copyright 2002 hayden a. james - All Rights Reserved
knightlyshadows
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791
obscured vision
1 posted 2002-04-07 04:59 PM


Hayden I thought this was a good write. I think its the first thing I've ever read of yours but I think I'll check out some mofe now. I liked your word usage in this and thought the flow was pretty good.

"fingers of life's cycle must continue to clench.
enclosing the answers to questions, conjecture it flows.
eyes wide open as if my insides were in wench.
yet a mellow is reaped from the smell etched in my nose."
I really enjoyed that stanza. ^

And the last two lines I loved. Keep em coming!

“A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.”

I know Im not perfect but I can smile
& I hope that you c this heart behind my tired eyes

PoetryIsLife
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763
...in my boxers...
2 posted 2002-04-08 12:43 PM


"another night of desires, imaginings, aspirations and needs."

Hayden, I loved it.
Especially the last line!
I loved how clear your emotion, yearning, confusion, and hope seemed to be. I should, just emotion. The emotion shown through. What emotion that is is left up to us. Tommorrow is always a new day. *nods* Splendid piece here. I enjoy your work. You have a lot of talent...

~ Titus

"Tesous Christos, Theou Uios, Soter"

xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
3 posted 2002-04-08 01:34 PM


Beautiful images...You wrote this very well. I enjoyed it a lot..thanks for sharing this with us!

iTs bEeN 1 Of ThOsE dAyZ 4 2 MaNY dAyZ nOw..I jUst NeEd a DaY whErE tHe WOrLd cAn tAkE cArE of ItsElf..

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258
meet Morgana
4 posted 2002-04-08 07:32 PM


Very interesting, deep, thoughtful, provoking, and the images in this poem were beautiful. Thank you so much for posting this. I really enjoyed reading it.

DE

"I never claimed to be your savior
I said I had a dirty mouth
Stop analyzing my behavior
If you’re too dumb to work it out"
Garbage

haydenjames
Member
since 2002-02-14
Posts 164
Antigua & Barbuda
5 posted 2002-04-08 09:34 PM


Thanks so much everyone for your kind words. It's so nice to have kind readers. I'm glad my poem is appreciated.

My poetry is at:  http://www.thehayden.org

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #5 » evening stream of thought.

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary