Teen Poetry #5 |
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the day i said hello |
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punkrockerrobin![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV ![]() |
the day i said hello to you, i never thought i'd fall in love with you. the love you have showed me, i shall not forget if we ever part. the day i said hello, was the day i my life changed. instead of saying friend i say, the one who makes me happy eveyday. the day i said hello, is the day i won't forget! robin ok so i'm no good at love poems! just thought i'd give it a try. ![]() i'm lovin this ct it's awesome!! i don't give up without a fight so boys beware! [This message has been edited by poeticgirl01 (edited 08-21-2001).] |
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© Copyright 2001 Robin Hill - All Rights Reserved | |||
punkrockerrobin![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
can ya tell i didn't have my glasses on when i wrote this? i don't give up without a fight so boys beware! |
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TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
I liked your poem is was good keep up the great work! Lauren |
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chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
"the day i said hello to you, i never thought i'd fall in love with you." We never know what tomorrow will bring. ![]() "the love you have showed me, i shall not forget if we ever part." ...and somethings we never forget...nicely done. "instead of saying friend i say, the one who makes me happy eveyday." The flow was a bit off here. But I understand what you're trying to say. It was a good attempt to write a love poem, Robin. Simple and to the point, although it did lack a bit or emotion and depth. But nonetheless, a very sweet poem! Good work! ![]() £êåh Va pensiero sull' ali dorate... |
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slickpnkgal New Member
since 2001-08-12
Posts 5 |
tks you liked it you really really liked it ![]() robin |
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punkrockerrobin![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
ok sorry i keep forgetting to switch names when i'm at my friends house. robin i don't give up without a fight so boys beware! |
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Jezziekaka Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 58where the trees touch the sky |
very sweet ![]() be dangerous, unpredictable, and make a lot of noise! |
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Fading Away![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
This was a very nice love poem... I agree with Leah when she said it's lacking emotion. I think this could be a VERY good poem if you put a little more into it.. Nicely done, though. I enjoyed it ![]() --Marie If going to church makes you a Christian, then sitting in a garage makes you a car. |
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