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Teen Poetry #5
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fly away
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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fly away |
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DarkAngelOfTheStars Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 255 |
Little girl fly away To where the emptiness fades And life begins Where you rise above All the sorrows That have controlled A life in which you drown Never again Stand beside yourself Hating the image you portray Fly high And dance with the stars Never forgetting The love you share And the life that is to come ok im not sure if this one is finished but it is for now :P havent you all missed me?! You know you 've completely descended into madness when the matter of shampoo has ascended to philosophical heights |
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| © Copyright 2001 Kat - All Rights Reserved | |||
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
hey, I liked this one. It was good. In my opinion, I think you could add a little more to complete it, but it's good the way it is too.I hope to see more soon Jon "Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine |
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Poet Unknown Member
since 2001-08-14
Posts 140Missouri |
what to say bout it hmm, it was great i enjoyed readin it  )Only darkness falls on those without souls |
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zarina Member
since 2001-05-19
Posts 180 |
It's nice.  I am always myself. Isn't that enough for you? |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
Fly away...Oh how nice that would be...  I liked this alot...I thought the short lines were a great touch...I GUESS you could add to it...BUT- I like it just fine how it is. Miss you? HaHaHa- No.  .......kidding.  You wouldn't worry about what people thought about you if you knew how seldom they did. |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
I missed you!!  It's awesome to see your name back on the forum pages, DAOTS! I really liked this one... unfinished, yes (so it seemed), but very well written.. This brought back familiar thoughts. When I was little, I used to envy caterpillars because they could turn into these beautiful creatures and fly away... completely unharmed. Flying away... a dream of mine when I was young... thanks so much for bringing these memories back. Awesome work. I enjoyed what you have, and if you come back and work on it a little more, I would LOVE to see the finished product Well done. --Marie If going to church makes you a Christian, then sitting in a garage makes you a car. |
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TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
Great poem keep up the awsome work1 Lauren |
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Low Man's Lyric Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 236In a dream |
I like this poem, the thought and creativity behind it is really great. Often times I would like to "fly away" as well, 'till your next! "Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before." |
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LoneWolf Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 384IL |
WOW this is great. i loved it. wonderful job here. It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I thought this was fine, but I really didn't know when to stop or go due to no punct. Anyhow, I did enjoy this poem.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Jezziekaka Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 58where the trees touch the sky |
DarkAngelOfTheStars~ I love this poem!! be dangerous, unpredictable, and make a lot of noise! |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
"Fly high And dance with the stars Never forgetting The love you share And the life that is to come" you did a FINE job on writing this, Kat ...the message is one to inspire ...im glad to see one of your poems again!...i really liked it...buh bye  if i die before i wake...i pray the Lord my soul to take - when thugs cry- |
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