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Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

0 posted 2001-08-08 10:18 PM

WHy worry?just fear
I don't care
but how am i going to
live with all this hate
tears well up in glass eyes
the doll shatters on the floor
procelian screams out in pain
while her stuffing scatters away
forgotten
how can you let me take this?
let me lower myself to fraud
you were right when
you had hated me.

Regina M.A Levy

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

1 posted 2001-08-09 01:10 AM

I REALLY liked the beginning and the ending is just so negative wow. I don't think it's right to hate anyone. ANyhow, c'mon be happeh ok?

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

punkrockerrobin

Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 1180
Sparks, NV

2 posted 2001-08-09 01:29 AM

take javi's advice (hes really good at that) be happy cus life is to short to hate or be hated.
robin

i don't give up without a fight so boys beware!

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

3 posted 2001-08-09 09:27 AM

this is powerful....I like the punch it packs...

sean mani
Junior Member

since 2001-08-06

Posts 27

4 posted 2001-08-09 02:31 PM

hate...what an unusual word...

well done in writing

sean

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

5 posted 2001-08-09 08:17 PM

I personally like your more optimistic pieces better. The ending was very sad... I enjoyed this, though, Regi.

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

6 posted 2001-09-07 02:15 PM

Now this I like! It is so strong and so negative which is always a big plus in my eyes. Happy pieces are rather sickening.

"tears well up in glass eyes
the doll shatters on the floor
procelian screams out in pain"
^^ great lines there.

You should be proud of this piece, Regina. It is quite good.

~AF~

"Kelly's my Hero!" "No, Kelly's your heroine." "Kelly has heroin??" "What?"

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

7 posted 2001-09-08 01:05 AM

sad...and quiet powerful...nice use of imagery...enjoyed

if i die before i wake...i pray the Lord my soul to take - when thugs cry-

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

8 posted 2001-09-23 12:56 PM

arghhh, let's talk

If only I can take away your anger and pain
be strong Ina

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Allysa, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Ma

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