Teen Poetry #5 |
![]() ![]() |
Nocturnal Angel |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA ![]() |
Pentrate my restless soul Let my blood trickle Down between the void Of waking dreams And aching fantasies Command my heart I long to be Your marrionette My lips burn with fever To be wrapped deep within Immortal nights And endless plights Of Insatiable fires Forever be my Dark Knight And I promise Upon this bed of crushed roses To forever be Your Nocturnal Angel... |
||
© Copyright 2002 Kristen Brandon - All Rights Reserved | |||
PoetryIsLife![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763...in my boxers... |
![]() Kristen, I love it. Very.... pleading and desperate. Much emotion and yearning in it. Yet, a bit of a sadness. "Pentrate my restless soul Let my blood trickle Down between the void Of waking dreams And aching fantasies" These lines flow quite lovelylike. ![]() ![]() ~ Titus "Tesous Christos, Theou Uios, Soter" |
||
Kielo Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109 |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Geez... This was simply amazing... You write beautifully, and the emotion was well-expressed, and very clear. *sits stunned for a little while, then decides its time to close her hanging jaw* Wow... Kielo I LOVE YOU! *kisses you* hehehe... |
||
chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
I really enjoyed this somewhat short piece of yours! Some beautifully worded phrases as well! The harsh sounds of "t"s, "p"s and "d"s gave the poem a little oomph and strength. Nicely done! Thanks for sharing! leah "...and sometimes when the music whispers softly in your ears, take some time to dream a dream and put aside your fears..." ~r.h.a.p.s.o.d.y. [This message has been edited by chasing rain (04-04-2002 06:28 PM).] |
||
Child of the Stars![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Ooh...Very dark (duh, Carly. Nocturnal Angel). I love this side of passion...not the lovey-dovey-let's-go-pick-flowers-together-and-have-a-picnic type of deal. I like this lots. Thanks for the change of scenery. ~Carly "Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions." |
||
xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
There definately was a strong sense of yearning in this which was amazingly expressed through your words. I enjoyed this so much, the words you wrote were srong and powerful. Well done kristin iTs bEeN 1 Of ThOsE dAyZ 4 2 MaNY dAyZ nOw..I jUst NeEd a DaY whErE tHe WOrLd cAn tAkE cArE of ItsElf.. |
||
quietlydying![]() ![]()
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935the wonderful land of oz |
'Down between the void Of waking dreams And aching fantasies' wow. there is some serious talent here. don't stop writing. /gwen/ so foul and fair a day i have not seen. - macbeth act 1, scene 3 |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |