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Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

0 posted 2001-07-26 04:42 PM


This was inspired by the poem "when death comes" by Mary Oliver. It was given to me at the end of the school year by my mentor. Hope you are reading this ms. banks. Its also for a couple of ppl in this poetry forum.


"WHEN DEATH COMES"

When the door of darkness
opens will I be able to
sink away with no regrets?
Shall I be able to say
I've lived life to its
fullest
or Will I perish into the
darkness without the joy
of saying I've led a
good life
I will want to stay
I will fight,
If I cant say goodbye
without regrets you might
as well kill me
When its over I want to
say Ive climbed the
highest mountain
surpassed all my doubts
will my story say that
I've fought the bear
or will it say I jumped
off the bridge?
Will my children say
I was the disgrace
of my family
the loony one,
will my love stay true?
or will he say, "forget her"
I do not know the whole world
yet but I hope that someday
my storm clouds will clear
Just the thought of my death
brings me onto my knees
begging for immortality
To those i thank you
for saving me for an early
death
"I dont want to end up simply having
visited this world"

Regina


If you only understood my pain then maybe you could learn to be my friend. Be there. My crying shoulder. The smiles. And the caring i need to survive.

© Copyright 2001 Regina Levy - All Rights Reserved
anonymous albert ?
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

1 posted 2001-07-26 06:33 PM


"I dont want to end up simply having
visited this world"

awesome...wow...home hitting piece...loved this one...enjoyed greatly...bye Ina

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2001-07-27 01:03 AM


I'm guessing the last part was from the poem that inspired you. If so, i think you should have put yer own little thing at the end. The whole poem is yers, might as well end it yours.
If you wrote that, then awesome job.
I really liked the poem as a whole. i thought you did wonderfully on this one Regi. Well done!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

JBaker515
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Member
since 2001-02-28
Posts 458
Dartmouth College
3 posted 2001-07-27 01:09 AM


one word..
marvelous.

~Jeff~

"Within you I lose myself
Without you I find myself
Wanting to be lost again."



Jessica
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Member
since 2001-06-28
Posts 350
South AL
4 posted 2001-07-27 04:36 AM


Ina ~ I enjoyed this very much   Exellent write!  
cherish
Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........
5 posted 2001-07-27 04:57 AM


When its over I want to
say Ive climbed the
highest mountain
surpassed all my doubts


regi....this is awesome as are all your poems!!! *appluds*..oh hang on  ...<~~~ there you go!!!
loved this one as well!

"I hope my mum and I hope my dad
Will figure out why they get so mad
I hear them scream, I hear them fight
Say bad words that make me wanna cry"
E

anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
6 posted 2001-07-28 11:42 AM


Jeez Regi! You sure know how to hit a person hard. It's good that someone saved you from an early death because not everyone has that.....
Thanks for the read. It can go into the library with the rest of your series.  

~AF~

"Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs." -- Robin Williams

Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
7 posted 2001-08-02 11:45 PM


With each piece of work in this series, I am more and more amazed... absolutely oustanding work you have here.  THe ending was FANTASTIC, and to end it with the quote from the song I thought was a good way to end it, as that was the song that inspired you.  Nicely done, indeed.  All I can say about the content, is stay strong.  Keep your head up, and you will one day say that you climbed the highest mountain, and lived to tell about it.
Nicely done, Regi... I am VERY impressed!

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

Acies
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
8 posted 2001-09-20 09:06 PM


The last lines hit hard
I really can't say much
I'm just out of words right now
*applauds*

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Allysa, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Ma

punkrockerrobin
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Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180
Sparks, NV
9 posted 2001-09-21 12:17 PM


great poem very well written.
robin

bye lizzy,javi,acire,cherish,SEA,vicky,laura,andrea,jessa and anyone else i forgot i will be back to torment you soon muhahahahahahaha

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