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HopelessRomanticGuy
Member

since 2001-08-17

Posts 495
LI, New York

0 posted 2002-09-06 11:13 PM

She always looks so angry
though I really wish she'd smile
I wish that I could make her happy
if even only for a while

I try to see the soul within
to see the colors of her heart
For something there does make me sin
it causes me to fall apart

For within my soul
I love her so
yet she's so cold
and I can't go

to melt her heart
until I stop mine
from falling apart

***************************************************
Thanks for reading my poem! If you read this far, I salute you! LOL Thanks. Really. Yet now i have another favor to ask of you... could you please give me suggestions for a title for this.... cuz i'm stumped... Thanks!

-Rich

[This message has been edited by HopelessRomanticGuy (09-07-2002 10:43 PM).]

devinechild22
Senior Member

since 2002-08-28

Posts 571

1 posted 2002-09-06 11:30 PM

hey!
this is a really good poem! i really really liked it. i think you poured your soul out there and it is really great. thanks for all your post too. i hope to read more of your stuff.

Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

2 posted 2002-09-07 11:02 AM

Hey! This was really cool. The last stanza threw me off because the words were so short, but it might just be me. The title might be hard. Correction it is. Yea. I have no clue!

Ri

~* Someday, I will conquer it and then I will be free *~

SunShine913

Member

since 2001-08-19

Posts 211
Italy but from NC

3 posted 2002-09-07 12:45 PM

RICH, hey hun .. long time no read? were you been??? but once again i loved your poem but a name for it i have no clue .. i no good at naming my own hehe.. but i loved your work .. you should post more~!!

*!~!* Andrea *!~!*
soon to be mother

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

4 posted 2002-09-07 12:45 PM

This was very well written. As for a title, how about something like..."To see her smile"
Or something about making her happy. Just a thought.

Jenn

Why is it that we are at our most ingenius only when trying to destroy the things that keep us alive and thriving?

katherine
Member

since 2000-06-10

Posts 365
Canberra Australia

5 posted 2002-09-08 03:01 AM

this is good, 'scared' for the title. Alot of the time people who are hard like that are just scared of letting their gard down. I don't know I tryed.

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