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Teen Poetry #5
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LCBS
Senior Member
since 2001-11-29
Posts 532
Connecticut

0 posted 2002-08-21 01:11 AM



Your words are pulsing through my head
Fail
They are tempting me with what I know I’ll do
Fail
Because I always do
Fail
And who am I to disappoint you
Fail
But why can’t I ever satisfy you
Fail
Because you are me, and I am never satisfied
Fail
Because I need to be critical
Fail
Because I need to succeed
Fail
Because it’s the only thing I’m good at
Fail
Because that’s me
*I don't know how poetically correct this is, it's more of a self pity-ing vent....you can just let it die if you want, some evil voice in my head is chanting "post post post" so I guess I should listen to him.



© Copyright 2002 Lisa Bednarz - All Rights Reserved
Nazera29
Junior Member
since 2002-08-14
Posts 34
Connecticut
1 posted 2002-08-21 01:29 AM


li,
i like this alot, it is very honest and i love your constant fail fail fail in it... it gives it a rhythm.  but i just want you to know that you are a great person, so tell yourself to ease up! you are the best!
love ya kid,
Jess

*We are the hero in our own story*

anya
Member
since 2002-07-27
Posts 393
London, UK
2 posted 2002-08-21 10:24 AM


'Because I need to succeed', I know that feeling! I get my exam results tommorow so thankyou for posting this, it's how I'm feeling right about now.
anya

LCBS
Senior Member
since 2001-11-29
Posts 532
Connecticut
3 posted 2002-08-22 12:54 PM


so anya, how'd you do on the exam??

~Lisa

And this little masochist, she's ready to confess

-Tori Amos

vixengrl04
Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495
East Haddam, CT
4 posted 2002-08-22 02:45 PM


I could relate to this really well, because I am defintely my worst critic.  I liked the repitition of "fail" because it was almost as if I could hear the voice chanting in your head (well maybe there isnt a voice chanting in your head lol, but there is in mine).  This was a great post!!

Always,
Nikki

     *~Fighting for your love~*
    *~Is something I cannot do~*
   *~I'm not good enough to win~*
*~And I'm not strong enough to lose~*

anya
Member
since 2002-07-27
Posts 393
London, UK
5 posted 2002-08-22 04:07 PM


thanks for asking, I got 2 A*'s, 5 A's and two B's, however that probably doesn't mean much to you as I think you Americans have a very different exam system but I am over the moon just about now
Smiles and Cries
Junior Member
since 2002-08-23
Posts 16
Newrk De
6 posted 2002-08-24 01:52 AM


I really loved this..i love it when things are repeated in poems...this rocked

Have u ever Loved somebody so much it makes u cry? Have u ever needed something so bad u cant sleep at night? Have u ever tried to find the words but

punkrockerrobin
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180
Sparks, NV
7 posted 2002-08-24 04:29 AM


lisa we only fail so we learn but girl if it hurts that much we need to talk!

you either like me for who i am or you don't like me at all

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