Teen Poetry #5 |
![]() ![]() |
Empty |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
nichola_louise Junior Member
since 2002-08-17
Posts 24Adelaide, Australia |
The jagged edge presses deep, Faith biting into skin, Releasing all emotions And freeing the demons within. Succumbing to the peacefulness As the pain ebbs away. The note you left says nothing But you've nothing left to say. In the hollow of your soul Is a rightness for your course, A tower built so solid It withstands all reason's force. All over now as sleep takes hold, A night, tonight, an end. Beliefs and fears and failings No longer to defend. [This message has been edited by nichola_louise (08-19-2002 01:58 AM).] |
||
© Copyright 2002 Nichola Louise - All Rights Reserved | |||
Skyfire![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
"The note you left says nothing But you've nothing left to say." I love it! I was just like "woah!" when I read that. It was like you were writing it to end a relationship or something... tell me if I'm wrong though ![]() |
||
nichola_louise Junior Member
since 2002-08-17
Posts 24Adelaide, Australia |
It is about me letting go a of pain a very close friend caused me. Im glad you liked it......please feel free to e-mail me is you have any other comments [email protected] |
||
Allysa![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952In an upside-down garden |
I, too, enjoyed that line. It was excellent. This poem is very strong and clearly exhibits the strong emotion that you feel about the subject matter. Oh yeah, WELCOME TO PASSIONS! ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
||
vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
Hey there, I liked this piece quite a bit!!! You expressed yourself very well, and that makes for good poetry. Sometimes we've got to let go of someone/something, although it may hurt, because ultimately it will hurt more if we do not. I think you wrote this very well!! ![]() Always, Nikki *~Fighting for your love~* |
||
Mysteria![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I got so many different ideas from this poem (which is a good sign of a good poem. I found at first I was thinking that the pain was so bad the "character" wished to end it, but that thier religion stopped them, then after you explained it was about a friendship ending, I got even more confused. I hope you write out all the pain that you are feeling, Passions is a wonderful place with caring people that will listen. Welcome to the home of Passions. The most valuable thing you own is a smile, wear it, and share it. |
||
Child of the Stars![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Whoa...This was really, really...great. I can't really say anything original that hasn't already been said, heh. I love the line that Skyfire mentioned, too... I'm looking forward for more of your poetry. ~Carly "Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions." |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |