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Teen Poetry #5
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Luring Smile
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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Luring Smile |
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Riley 
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain 
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painting a vivid picture upon the blurry state of mind i let you watch as i smile drawing you slowly to me i knew i shouldn't try new powers unto myself yet i persist and smile more closer you come shall you be likness shown through conversation lacking basic structure everything i know crumbles beneath my slinking feet shall i laugh so more to love me even spite the simple answer is yes for i do not know my strength years from now i look back to the way i smile laugh along i shake my head in shame knowing i shouldn't have tryed yet there you sit years ago just catching what glimpse you may in my head the song i know plays that you sang to me that night listening i sang along making it worse wanting so bad to push away my eyes see lips slowly moving inplanting in my mind watching i hear you sing about many moons ago when you first saw my smile and heard my dreadful laugh i am scared of what will happen knowing inside of my head that nothing will be alright now all because you watched me you saw my smile and couldn't resist as many before have done laughing along gorgeous shunned no played with my mind soon the idea got to be good yet the intention seemed to worse i got even a smile back luring me in as well now as i lay in bed tonight i think to myself what done i know somehow i did the right thing i turn and to your smile To the world you maybe a person, but to a person you maybe the world |
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| © Copyright 2002 Riley Grant - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Savage Quiescence Member
since 2002-07-29
Posts 326Wandering |
So you are just a beginner, aye? Well you certainly show a real talent! I do have a question, is there any reason you do not capitalize "I", or do you just not feel like it? Just curious! I particularly enjoyed the first verse, you did a very good job at catching the reader's attention here. I look forward to viewing more of your work! ~Sky "Whatever life brings, I've been through everything, but now I'm on my knees again" -Creed |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
If you're just beginning, then you're not allowed to stop, okay  Cause if you stop, then I won't be able to watch you develop the talent that I can see  Great job so far with your writing! |
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vixengrl04 Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 495East Haddam, CT |
Wow, this was very good, especially since you call yourself a "beginner". This was not a beginner's work! I like the whole idea of your smile luring him in. Very good job with this! Hope to see more!! Always, Nikki *~Fighting for your love~* |
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