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Teen Poetry #5
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lily drop
New Member
since 2002-07-13
Posts 3


0 posted 2002-07-20 01:30 PM


The cenery flys by
The car speeds up,
then slows down
The rocky hills mope bythe car bumps along the paved road
Radio hums the beat
the car sounds with laughter
the day slows down to night
the stares fleck out one by one
the laughter slows to an end
till all that can be hurd
is the sound of the car hum.


© Copyright 2002 lily drop - All Rights Reserved
clve527
Member
since 2002-07-08
Posts 200

1 posted 2002-07-20 05:52 PM


I am just curious, is cenery a long lost relative of celery?

Casey

If all you want is emotion, go down to walmart, buy yourself a diary and hide it in a drawer where no one can see...

LCBS
Senior Member
since 2001-11-29
Posts 532
Connecticut
2 posted 2002-07-20 05:57 PM


Some people do make mistakes, Casey (I seem to remember something with the word despise).

I believe the writer meant scenery.  

Great job!  You painted a great picture for me.  Welcome to Passions!

~Lisa

[This message has been edited by LCBS (07-20-2002 05:58 PM).]

clve527
Member
since 2002-07-08
Posts 200

3 posted 2002-07-20 06:39 PM


I can understand mistakes, but my mistake was not in the poem.  I put work into the poem, along with many edits over time.  Besides that isn't the only mistake in this piece.

Casey

If all you want is emotion, go down to walmart, buy yourself a diary and hide it in a drawer where no one can see...

quietlydying
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz
4 posted 2002-07-20 06:56 PM


har har har.

immature, but amusing.

you might want to proofread your work before posting.

just a thought.

/jen/

so foul and fair a day i have not seen.  - macbeth act 1, scene 3

lily drop
New Member
since 2002-07-13
Posts 3

5 posted 2002-07-20 10:27 PM


I have a question for you all is this (site) on how well one can spell or on the love and passion for poetry in itself?
clve527
Member
since 2002-07-08
Posts 200

6 posted 2002-07-21 03:24 PM


Well, is the reader expected to mind read and figure out what you meant to say rather than what you did?

Casey

If all you want is emotion, go down to walmart, buy yourself a diary and hide it in a drawer where no one can see...

Spine Grinder
Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...
7 posted 2002-07-24 07:01 PM


i understood what she meant, y couldnt u?

~In the end..it doesn't even matter...~LP

clve527
Member
since 2002-07-08
Posts 200

8 posted 2002-07-24 07:11 PM


I couldn't because it is not my job as a reader to decipher a poet's mistakes in spelling.  How can you honestly say that a poem that is plagued with misspellings is a good poem?  

Casey

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